


The Twin Brother

by VeronicaFerCard



Category: Merlin (TV), Parked (2010)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Crossover, Drinking, Drunken Confessions, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Letters, M/M, Minor Character Death, POV Arthur, References to Drugs, Twins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-26
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-12 09:52:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 24,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9066631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeronicaFerCard/pseuds/VeronicaFerCard
Summary: Arthur’s voluntary work leads him to meet a young drug addict. And when he tries to help him, Arthur ends it up meeting the guy’s twin brother.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first fic in English, and oh boy I had to correct _a lot_ of stuff. I wrote it in 2012 and had post it on LJ, shitty English and all. And corrected it, I believe. But if anything it's still weird or plain wrong let me know.

At only twenty-eight Arthur Pendragon was already a successful businessman.

He had also always enjoyed engaging in voluntary work in his spare time; though thanks to his father and their line of work, he almost never had this so called spare time. 

But ever since Uther’s death, six months ago, Arthur had decided to spend some time in Dublin, just to clear his mind and take a break from the business world. At least that was what he had told Leon and Morgana, in order to get them off his feet, and convince them he was just fine, thank you very much.

The truth though, was that Uther’s death and the end of Arthur’s marriage - events that happened in the same month - kind of forced Arthur to run from everything before he had a breakdown.

Arthur had really loved Lancelot. And at that moment, sitting on a bench in a parking lot with the letter – _really_ , only Lance would still use paper and ink instead of sending an email or a text, like anyone else in this century – from his former partner, telling him that he was going to be a father, Arthur could feel nothing but happiness for him. Gwen seemed to be a great person if all the positive and downright _loving_ adjectives Lance used to describe her were any indication.

His relationship with Lance had lasted for five years. It could have gone further, Arthur thought, but the problem (one of them) was that Father had never approved his boyfriend. Ever since Arthur came out, or rather, ever since Uther told Arthur he’s son was gay – because _he was his father and he knew Arthur better than anyone_ -Uther had tried to throw men (sons of business partners, bankers, politicians) at him. But after the third time Arthur had turned them down Uther wasn’t so pleased, so he changed his game and started to introduce women to Arthur; women that were rather… evil or don’t right clueless.

Arthur cringed at the thought of Sophia and Vivian. 

And that was when he met Lancelot, who worked at a coffee shop inside the campus, a place Arthur had never set foot before until then,  when he came back from his “date” with Vivian, which had been so awful that, mid-way through it, Arthur had started a drinking game… with himself.

 To this day he is not sure if he won or lost, but the fact was that the next day found Arthur as one of the first customers at the coffee shop, with a huge hangover and craving for salvation in the form of the hot dark liquid as if his life depended on it, which was probably not a complete lie at the moment.

Lance had given him the biggest cup of coffee in the shop, and his nice smile and gentle manner had won Arthur over right then and there. That, plus the fact that Lance was a Hispanic God and, besides the good looks, he also had the kindness to listen to the fiasco that was Arthur’s love life.

The relationship had developed easily from that day, and as things started to happen, at the end of his uni years Arthur found himself getting a ring the same day he got his degree.

Of course, things were not so easy with Father, who had yelled and got five shades of red when he found out his millionaire heir was going out with a barista.  But Lance didn’t like Uther either and so they got married anyway, even with Uther’s absence at the wedding day and Lance saying that he would never set a foot on the Pendragon household… any of them.

The married life was a roller coaster since Lance didn’t accept Arthur’s money and as for his part, Arthur was used to a certain lifestyle, which did not include recycling, veganism or yoga. And of course, Father’s presence was a constant in their life. Not that Uther was ever in his apartment, but he kept Arthur at the office more than ever and started to send him to conferences that took places in other countries.

When Uther found out he had cancer Arthur was there for him, like always. He started to spend his nights by his father’s side at the hospital, and when Uther decided to stay home because there was nothing else to be done, Arthur went with him.

 He didn’t see Lance for almost three months. And even though they talked over the phone every night, it wasn’t enough and Arthur knew it.

Deep down though, Arthur always thought Lance should have understood.

All the responsibility was on Arthur’s shoulders. He had his sister and her husband Leon to help, of course. But he was the one in charge and he had to take care of everything. So when Lance stopped answering his calls Arthur went to their apartment, only instead of his husband all he found was a letter on the coffee table.

_“I’m sorry. I can’t do this anymore. I loved you, but it was killing me. I’m at a friend’s house, when you have time please take your stuff and let me know. It was real Arthur but now is over._

_Lancelot”_

Arthur had been so angry and hurt that he had texted Lance saying he could have everything in the house and that it was a good thing their marriage hadn’t actually been real – even if the ring on his finger had felt more real than all the papers they had yet (and now never would) sign – because they wouldn’t have to go through all the trouble of a legal divorce.

Father was dead two weeks after the breakup.


	2. Chapter 2

The phone woke him up. Arthur didn't even realize he had slept on the couch.

 _"Arthur, mate. Is Peter. Listen, could you do me a favor and cover for me in soup delivery today? I got a wedding to go."_  

Peter was one of the guys who worked with Arthur at the community center. He was in charge of the food delivery for the homeless people, but since there were only four people on the project, every time one of them needed, the others were willing to give a hand.

“Sure Pete, no problem. Where do I have to go?”

Peter gave him the address, and added, _“Is a parking lot. There are only two blokes, Fred Daly and Cathal Emrys. They’re good people. Listen, we’re not supposed to give anything for Cathal, but I know Fred is going to share with him anyway so I always give a little more.”_

“Why we can’t give food to him?”

 _“He’s a junkie, the poor sod.”_ Arthur vaguely remembered when they gave him a lecture about the food distribution, and how the people at the community center tried to used it as a bargaining chip to keep the homeless from doing drugs. It sounded harsh at the time, but Arthur didn’t say anything, he was new there and had no right to mess with their system. Over the line, Pete carried on sorrowfully, _“Lost his ma in a car accident. He was the one driving.”_

“That’s sad. But doesn’t explain why he’s homeless.” It always buggered Arthur how people ended up living in the streets, their most basic needs neglected.

_“Well, he started using it, quit uni… then his da kicked ‘im out of the house.”_

“And he’s got no one else?” Arthur asked intrigued. It was a very sad story.

 _“He has a twin brother, but the bloke lives in London, I guess._ ” Pete’s uninterested tone was an indication that the conversation was over. He had been doing this for a lot longer than Arthur, and that kind of story didn’t affect him as it did Arthur. _“Anyway, be there at 4 pm. I have to go, thanks again, mate.”_

***

“Fred Daily?” Arthur received a quizzical look as an answer, so he tried again, “Cathal Emrys?”

Cathal Emrys was a very skinny, dark haired, blue eyed man, who could have been considered attractive, if not for the fact that his teeth looked like they hadn't seen a tooth brush in months.

“That’s me. Who’re you?” He changed his joint to the left hand and offered the right for Arthur to shake. Arthur took it.

“Arthur Pendragon. I’m covering for Peter today. I brought food!” He showed the beige paper bag for the young man.

“Right,” Cathal nodded. “Fred’s not here. Do you want to wait for him?”

Arthur considered it for a moment, before making up his mind. “Or I could just give it to you,” he said finally, offering the bag to Emrys.

“Do you trust me?” Cathal asked with a cocky grin. He didn’t go for the bag. “You know I’m not supposed to take it, right?”

“Yeah, Pete told me. But he also said that you and Fred shared the food anyway, so…” Arthur shrugged.

Cathal took the bag from Arthur’s hand with an amused “cheers”, and put it on the front seat of his yellow car. It was only then that Arthur noticed that the window had been replaced by a piece of plastic.

“What happened?” He pointed at the window.

Cathal shrugged nonchalantly. “Oh, this?” He asked, regarding the car. “Just a little accident, don’t worry about it.” He gave Arthur a smile which didn’t reach his eyes.

Cathal seemed so young. Arthur’s thoughts went back to what Peter had said about him. Arthur couldn’t help but wonder how the hell someone so young ended up living inside a small car with a broken window. But of course, the answer was right there between the boy’s fingers.

“So, um… Peter told me about your mother. Sorry for that.” He stayed silent for a moment and then said, “I know what it feels like.” Arthur wasn’t always open about his family, especially his mother, who died in childbirth, but he really wanted to know more about the Cathal and he knew the only way was to give information about himself first.

“Killed your ma, too uh?” Cathal finished the joint and trashed on the street. He made a show of stepping on it to kill the fire before looking back at Arthur.

“She died when I was born. Sometimes I feel like it was my fault.” Arthur confessed in a small voice. It was his time to avert his gaze.

“But no one blamed you, right? They didn’t throw that on yo face, did they?” Arthur could see Cathal was getting angry so he didn’t say anything. “Me own dad… he… the prick.”

“And what about your brother?”

“Got the whole history didn’t cha?” He smiled. The brother wasn’t a delicate subject, it seemed. “Merlin’s gonna be someone, someday. He’s gonna write a book and be fucking famous. You wait and see.”

“Merlin? Your brother’s name is Merlin?” Arthur couldn’t help but laugh.

Cathal laughed, too.

They talked for hours, then Fred arrived and Arthur excused himself promising that he’d come back anytime.

He was there the next day.


	3. Chapter 3

“Morning!” It wasn’t delivery day, but after they first met Arthur had stopped by almost every day. He enjoyed Cathal’s company. It had been a long time since he had truly enjoyed someone’s company. Well, there had been Lance, but that was different. There was nothing romantic about his relationship with Cathal. They were good friends, the boy was smart. He had studied economy at uni, just like Arthur so they had a lot to talk about.

“You should go back, you know. You could get a scholarship or something,” Arthur said one day.

“What for? Don’t think it’d make any difference,” Cathal had answered, taking another drag from his cigarette. 

Arthur didn’t say anything after that. He hadn’t told Cathal he was rich, he didn’t want him to feel like a charity case. Money could make people uncomfortable, and Arthur wouldn’t allow it to spoil his newly found friendship.

***

“Morning, Arthur!”

“Don’t you get tired of this?” Arthur asked pointing to the joint.

“ ‘S my break from reality,” Cathal said smiling. He was always smiling… and smoking. Well, maybe his coping system was working after all. Who was Arthur to judge?

“Hey Cathal!”

 Cathal’s smile faded away as soon as he heard the voice.

An almost bald bloke wearing a black coat appeared from behind Arthur, he didn’t see where the man came from, but if Arthur were to guess he would say the black car parked beside Fred’s would be a good guess.

“Arthur, I think you should go now.” Cathal jumped from the hood of the car where he had been sitting and went to the man’s direction, all traces of his typical easy going nature gone in the blink of an eye. Arthur had never seen him this serious before.

One look at his face and Arthur knew exactly what that was about.

Although he liked Cathal alright and enjoyed helping people that was a step too far, and Arthur wasn’t willing to take it. He wouldn’t mess with drug dealers.

***

Arthur didn’t go to see Cathal for a week. He told himself it was because he had other things to do, like catching up with his company business. Not that he didn’t trust Leon, but he was the owner, he had to look after the empire his father had left to him. But the truth was he was kind of scared to go there again. He was acting like a coward, and hated himself for it. But that drug dealer... Arthur didn’t want anything to do with those kinds of people. Father would have had his head if he knew his son was even in the same place as someone involved with drugs.

But he was also a Pendragon, and Uther wouldn’t like if he knew his son was avoiding a problem either. 

It wasn’t delivery day so Arthur just stopped by a McDonald’s an ordered two of the biggest meal they had.

When he got to the parking lot, he found Fred looking around with a worried expression. Cathal was nowhere to be seen.

“Hi, Fred!”

“Have you seen Cathal?” Fred asked and Arthur shook his head. “Have you talked to him lately at all?”

“I haven’t seen him in a week. What happened?” Arthur mimicked Fred’s movements eyeing his surroundings, though with no avail, as a sinking feeling began to grow from the bottom of his stomach.

“Those drug dealers. I told him to stop messing with those things. He was doing great, you know.  I think you were really inspiring him. But then you disappeared. He said it was because of the man you saw the other day. Is that what it is?” Fred shot Arthur a look full of mixed feeling: anger, fear and the one Arthur hated the most, disappointment.  “You ran away because you couldn’t deal with reality?” Fred shook his head sadly. “How can you work in the social service when you can’t even help a friend? Or this is just a hobby? A break from your business world?”

 Arthur was angry. Who the hell Fred thought he was to talk to him like that? But that wasn’t the worse part. The worse was that he was right. Arthur had cowered up when he saw the dealer but he thought Fred, even Cathal, could understand that. He was wrong. And then Arthur realized another thing.

“You know who I am!” He didn’t mean to sound like an accusation, but he was too angry to care.

“Of course I know who you are. Have you forgotten that I lived in London?”

“Oh.” He didn’t forget, during one of his conversations with Cathal he caught Fred’s life story out of the boy, but he didn’t even thought about the possibility of being recognized. He wasn’t an actor or anything like that. “Does Cathal know?”

“Yes, I told him. I told him to ask for your help. But he doesn’t want to. He said it would ruin your friendship.”  

In a different situation Arthur would probably stop to consider what that meant about the two of them, that he and Cathal had been thinking the same thing about what Arthur’s background could do to their friendship. It probably meant they were more alike than Arthur had thought.

But he put those considerations aside for now. There was a more pressing matter at hand.

“What do you mean ask for my help? What’s going on?”

“He didn’t tell you, did he? Didn’t think he would. That dealer. Cathal owed him a lot of money. He went for his dad, but that prick turned his back on his own son. That’s why I’m so worry about him. I caught him injecting!” Fred started passing around as he ran his hand through his hair. “He had said he didn’t do that.  I got angry at him. I left him alone. Then when I came back I found this.”

He pointed to the ground and for the first time Arthur looked around.

It was a mess.

Fred’s car was covered in red ink, there were things written but Arthur couldn’t figure messy letters out from one another. He frowned at it for a moment but quickly gave up trying to understand it. And then he moved his gaze to Cathal’s yellow car.

All the windows were broken now. The shattered glass was mixed with something dark on the ground. A closed look revealed to Arthur what he feared, it was blood. A lot of it.

Arthur panicked. Why didn’t he do anything? Why didn’t Cathal tell him? Why he had to be as stubborn as Arthur? His mind was running a mile a minute, and all the worst case scenarios Arthur could possibly think he was thing right now. What was he supposed to do? Was Cathal even still alive?

***

Arthur called everyone. He called Pete, he called the police, and he called Leon. Hell, he even called Morgana – because Leon was going to tell her and it doesn’t matter how much detail her husband gave to her, she would call Arthur to hear it from him. She would deny until she was blue in the face, but the fact was that his sister was very protective of him. Calling her would save a lot of time.

Fred for his part, called his friend Jules. She wasn’t much help but she kept him calm. The last thing Arthur needed was to have someone with a heart attack on his hands.

They searched for Cathal until the sun went down. And then there was nothing else for Arthur to do, so he went back to his flat; letting his number with Fred in case something happened. 

When he got home Arthur showered and ate the rest of a take away he found in the fridge. He was too agitated to sleep, so sat on the sofa and tried to pretend he was interested in whatever was playing on the television in front of him. The volume was so low he could hear every sound coming from the open window to his right, and even though his mind was miles away a familiar noise picked his attention and broke his train of thought.

Arthur got up and walked the few steps towards the window.

Fireworks.

It made him remember one of his conversations with Cathal.

_“Dad brought us to a firework display one time. Great day, that!”_

Arthur was so lost in his thought he almost didn’t hear when his mobile rang. He ran and picked up from where he had left it on the coffee table.

It was Fred.

Cathal was dead.


	4. Chapter 4

Father’s funeral was still fresh in Arthur’s memory. He didn’t want to see another person he cared about lying lifeless inside a coffin. It was too soon. Thank God Fred was there; otherwise, he wasn’t even sure he would be able to watch the service. Not just because it was hard to, but because of Balinor – Cathal’s dad – had mistaken him for one of Cathal’s drug buddies. And it wasn’t until Fred had explained everything that Arthur was able to come in to say his last goodbye to his friend.

Balinor Emrys was a cold man. If he had met Uther, they would probably get along. Or kill each other. Arthur wasn’t sure which.  Anyway, coldness was something Arthur cold work with, and that helped him go through the service without shouting at Balinor all the things that were stuck in his throat.

How could a father seem so distant at his own son’s funeral? No, it was not just distance. It was indifference. As if he didn’t know the person in the coffin in front of him. Balinor stared at Cathal’s peaceful face like he was a stranger. As if they had never met.

There were so few people that the whole thing didn’t last more than an hour.  And then there was just the three of them. Fred, Arthur, and Balinor – who Arthur was sure was only still there because it would be impolite to leave when there were still people mourning his son -   looking at Cathal’s grave.

“I think,” Fred started to say, and then he stopped as if he were in searching for the right words. “I think he somehow helped me find my way back home.”

Balinor snorted. “I thought you said you lived in your car.”

“Not anymore.” He took a step forward and put two fingers on Cathal’s gravestone. “Thank you, my friend.”

With those last words, Fred turned around and walked away.

Arthur was about to follow him when something popped up in his head. He turned his face to look at Balinor.

“Where’s Merlin?”

A look of surprise passed through Balinor’s face, but he quickly schooled his expression back to something unreadable, though he arched an eyebrow to Arthur was as he asked, “Do you know him?” He seemed a little uncomfortable at the mention of the name, or it could just be Arthur’s imagination.

“Cathal told me about him. He said he lives in London.” And it wasn’t that something! That Arthur was the one volunteering information about Balinor’s sons to the man himself when it should be the other way around, since Arthur had been the one to ask about it, and he didn’t even know Merlin.

Balinor shrugged. “Then you know where he is,” he answered before leaving Arthur alone with his son’s grave.

Arthur realized he had been wrong. Uther Pendragon had been a cold person, yes. But that man… Balinor Emrys had an iceberg for a heart.

***

 “Arthur!”

Arthur was already two blocks away from the cemetery. He stopped and turned around to see Fred running in his direction.

“I thought you had gone already,” Arthur said when Fred caught up to him.

Fred bent a little, putting his hands on his thighs as he tried to catch his breath from the run. He hadn’t run for even an entire minute, but Arthur supposed that was the sort of result you get when you are not used to exercising. And also, Fred was probably in his mid-forties.

“I had,” Fred said after a moment, straightening up his spine. “But then I remembered, there’s something–” He paused to look for something in his pockets. 

 As he waited for Fred to find whatever it was that he was searching, Arthur remembered the awkward conversation with Balinor and something clicked in his mind. “Fred?”

Fred stopped checking his pockets and look at Arthur through the frames of his glasses.

“Yes?”

“When Cathal’s father asked if you lived in your car. You said ‘not anymore’. What happened?”

“Oh. Haven’t you seen the papers? They published a note about my situation. Peter helped me. He made the arrangements for an interview. It worked.”

He smiled. And so did Arthur. In the middle of all that mess, at least there was something to be glad about.

“Congratulations Fred. I’m really happy for you.”

And then, all of the sudden, Arthur stepped forward and hugged Fred. Because that just seemed like the right thing to do at that moment. Fred hugged him back. When they pulled apart they smiled awkwardly at each other, then Fred put his hand on the left pocket of his jacket.

“Oh. There it is.” He pulled two white envelopes from his pocket.  They were clearly bigger than Fred’s pocket because they were folded together.  Fred unfolded them and handed both to Arthur.

“What’s this?”  It was a completely rhetorical question. Both envelopes had names written on their backs.  The first one had _Arthur_ written with blue ink. And the second one…

Arthur looked up at Fred and held the second envelope in front of him as he asked, “What should I do with it?”

“I think you already know the answer. But there must be some instruction in yours.”

He looked at the name on the second envelope again as if it could have changed. For a brief second Arthur stupidly hoped it would have.

  _Merlin._

“He trusted you,” Fred said.

It startled Arthur. They had been silent for so long he had thought Fred was already gone.

“I won’t let him down again,” he promised, mostly to himself.

 Fred just nodded at him.

***

When Arthur finally got home he felt so tired he crashed on the couch and fell asleep as soon as he closed his eyes.

He dreamed about Cathal. Except that wasn’t Cathal. The man in his dreams, though he looked just like his friend, was a completely different person. He had cold blue eyes; there was a letter in his hands. But instead of holding it like a precious memory, he looked Arthur in the eyes, ripped the letter in two pieces and threw them on the floor. 

Arthur woke up covered in sweat and even more tired than he had been before he slept.

It was crazy. He didn’t even know him, but it didn’t seem to matter. He looked at the letters on the coffee table. No, it didn’t matter they didn’t know each other. He knew Cathal, it was impossible not to like him. How could someone turn their back on him? How could someone turn their back on their own brother?  Arthur didn’t even know the bloke yet, but there was something about him.

Arthur was starting to hate Merlin Emrys.


	5. Chapter 5

 

“… _I think he still lives there._

_Once again I must thank you, Arthur, for being such a fucking good friend. I know you probably think you didn’t do much, but you did. And if you could do me this one last favor, please, I need to say goodbye to Merlin, if you could give him the letter that’d make you more fucking awesome._

_Cathal E. Emrys”_

He read the letter for what it seemed like the tenth time and still couldn’t believe what he had to do. It wasn’t just the fact that he would have to face Cathal’s mysterious brother; Arthur couldn’t give a flying fuck about Merlin.  He had to return to London, return to his empty apartment, to the office. Go back and face everything he had run away from. And all because he didn’t help Cathal properly, if he had, Cathal wouldn’t be dead, and Arthur could have gone on pretending he hadn’t run away from his life in London. But Arthur owed him this, and he’d be damn if he wasn’t going to grant Cathal’s last wish.

***

 “There you are!”

Morgana came over to him with open arms and a smile Arthur wasn’t used to. She was Uther’s daughter after all, and that meant public displays of affection were limited, if not completely absent.  But he missed his sister so when she wrapped her arms around his neck he hugged her back and it felt comfortable, it felt like coming home.

It hadn’t been even a week since Cathal’s funeral, but Arthur didn’t have anything that attached him to Dublin so it was easy to just pack his things, say goodbye to Pete and the lads from the community center promising the program would be in his payment list from now on,  and that he’d come back some time. It was easy to buy a ticket, to get inside the plane and land in London.

 “You missed me like hell, didn’t you?” Morgana gave him one of her evil smirks. That was more like her.

“Of course I did. Can’t you see my tears?” he joked along, only now realizing how much he missed their usual banter.

“You arse.” Morgana shoved his shoulder with her well-manicured hand. Arthur caught himself right on time, preventing him from knocking an old lady who was just passing behind him. He apologized anyway before turning back to his sister to give her the stink eye. It only lasted a second though, and then they were smiling at each other.

“So, how’s everything?” Arthur asked her. And since they were both Uther’s kids, Morgana knew that by _everything_ he meant their company.

“Well, well. All the same.” She waved dismissively. “Boring,” Morgana sighed. Software Companies are the dullest thing on earth. But tell me about you and your _Eat, Pray, Love_ experience. “

“I’m glad you consider me as a woman having a middle-age crisis.”

“Oh, don’t be such a princess.”

Arthur flipped her off, but Morgana just rolled her eyes in response as they walked to the doors.

When they got to Morgana’s car Arthur put his baggage in the boot and they hit the road. They were in the middle of the way when he realized they weren’t going to his place.

“Where’re we going?”

“Narnia,” Morgana deadpanned. “Where do you think?” She asked with an annoyed sigh as if it should be obvious to him. It wasn’t. “I bet your fridge is not even on.”

Arthur frowned at her, not completely sure he was following the track of the conversation. Maybe he was jet-lagged. Regardless though, he had to defend himself, “I’ve been away for six months! Why would I leave the fridge on?”

“Whatever,” Morgana shrugged, stealing a quick glance in his direction before turning her attention back to the road ahead. “Excuse me for not wanting you to die from starvation or eating takeaway forever,” she mumbled under her breath, trying way too hard to seem casual. She didn’t fool Arthur for a minute.

Morgana was worried about him.

“So what, I’ll stay with you and Leon until I do my grocery?” Arthur tried to joke in a desperate attempt of breaking the tension he could feel forming between the two of them. They had never dealt well with feelings, and Arthur had no intention of trying to work that out right now or anytime soon for what that mattered. He loved his sister and he knew she loved him just the same, there was no need to make it weird or uncomfortable for any of them.

“You’re not staying with us.” Arthur was not expecting that anyway, so he waited for Morgana to elaborate. “You’re staying at Uther’s.”

“No!” he replied. It came out harsher than he had planned and Morgana flinched slightly at his tone.

“Arthur,” she sighed, taking the opportunity that they had stopped at a traffic light to look him in the eyes as she spoke. “Look, his house is clean, there’s food and everything you need in there.” He opened his mouth but Morgana didn’t give him time to say anything as she continued, “All the necessary things for a human being. Catrina is there all the time.  Sometimes I think she’s even forgotten he is…”

She stopped mid-sentence, closing her mouth and shooting Arthur a guilty look.

Not a good sign.

Morgana was treating him with kid gloves. Probably thinking he was about to break down any moment. Or perhaps she was the one still in grief for their father, although he very much doubted that was the case. In any case, Arthur couldn’t stand the pity, so he smiled and moved on with the conversation.

“So, The Troll?”

 _Troll_ was Arthur and Morgana’s code word for Catrina, Uther’s ex-wife. It had nothing to do with her appearance, though. She was a beautiful woman. What made them give her the nickname was the fact that she had horrible manners and seemed to be incapable of eating with her mouth shut.       

“Ugh,” Morgana shuddered as she moved the car after the light turned green. “I think she doesn’t even remember the divorce.” Arthur nodded in agreement. “Anyway, at least she kept the house warm and cozy for you.”

He snorted, “I’m pretty sure it wasn’t for me.”

Morgana took a hand from the steering wheel to wave dismissively. “Details. It’s still your house.”

“Yours too,” he retorted.

“Yes, Arthur,” she said calmly as she turned left and entered the path leading directly to Uther’s penthouse. “But unlike you, I have a home.”

“I have a home, too,” Arthur replied weakly, he knew exactly where she was going with that and – to be quite honest –  he was running out of arguments.

“You have an apartment. Is not the same thing. This,” she said pointing to the house as after parking in front of it, “is your home.”

Arthur got off the car without a word and stared at the house. He heaved a sigh, feeling his chest heavy with something that might have been homesickness. Or maybe it was just nostalgia. Arthur wasn’t sure.

Morgana was not wrong, though. For good or bad that place had been the only home Arthur had ever known.

***

Morgana was right about something else as well.

It _did_ feel as if Uther was still alive. Except better, the house felt warmer than when Father was around. It felt strangely comfortable for some reason.

Arthur was pretty sure Morgana felt it too. They spent a few minutes in awkward silence as both of them looked around the living room as if waiting for Uther to come down the stairs with his reading glasses and a paper in his hands.

Morgana was the one to break the silence. “Well, make yourself comfortable. I’ve got things to do,” she declared, turning on her heels and heading for the door.

Arthur panicked momentarily with the idea of being left alone in the house. As far as he knew not even the staff was there right now. “Wait! You’re not staying?”

“Different from you, dear brother,” she began to answer, looking back at him, “I do have food at home. I don’t need to stay here.”

Despite her words, Arthur could see she was conflicted about leaving like that so he tried again. “I thought we could catch up!” He regretted as soon as the words came out of his mouth, though.

The sadness he had seen earlier was back in her eyes.

“Arthur, how are you, really?” Morgana asked as she walked back to him.

And now there was no escaping the scrutiny. A concerned Morgana was worse than a bitchy one. And of course, she could see right through him.

“I don’t know.” He couldn’t meet her eyes so he lowered his head and stared at the floor.

“Is it about Uther? Or Lancelot?”

“It has nothing to do with neither of them, actually.” He risked a glance at her. She didn’t look convinced. “I’ve met this guy –“

Morgana visibly relaxed. “Oh my God!” she squealed, “You’re in love!”

 “No! Oh, Jesus, no! That’s not -- no. I’m not in love. He’s dead. He died.” Morgana’s smile faded. “That seems to be the story of my life.” Arthur’s shoulder sagged. “People die around me when I try to help them.”

“Oh, Arthur,” she said sadly as she guided both of them to the couch. “Come on. Let’s catch up!”

He told her everything that happened in Dublin. He told her about Cathal, Fred, Cathal’s father and how lucky he felt for being Uther’s son when he met the man. And then he told her about the letter he had to give to Merlin and how he was so not looking forward to that.

She listened quietly and only spoke when he was done.

“Take the rest of the day to moan. Tomorrow morning you go find this Emrys kid, give him the letter and go straight to the supermarket, then go to your own house. Don’t let the Troll see you here. She might hug you. Oh, and eat. A lot. Because we’re getting pissed at night.” She got up and left before he could say anything.

Arthur smiled to himself. _That_ was his sister.

***

The receptionist was giving Arthur the I-don’t-care-I’m-not-doing-anything-my-shift-haven’t-started-yet look since 7:30 when he entered the building, but he wasn’t about to give up. Well. Not because of her anyway.

Truth was, Arthur didn’t want to come face to face with Merlin. He couldn’t explain it, but he had a good guess why. Merlin was Cathal’s twin brother. Which meant they looked alike; so it would feel like he was looking at what Cathal could have been if he had had support.

When the clock behind her announced 8 o'clock the brunette receptionist, Nimueh, from what was on her name tag, decided to acknowledge Arthur.

“How can I help you, sir?” She wasn’t even trying to hide all the sarcasm in her voice.

“I’m looking for Emrys, Merlin. He lives here, right?”

“Yes, second floor. Who should I announce?” She took the phone out off the hook and looked at him with her dead blue eyes.

“Oh, um. He doesn’t know me. Actually, I don’t know him either. But I have to give him something.”

“Of course,” the woman scoffed, putting the handset back in its place. “You don’t know each other but I should just let you in to _give him something_. Sure.”

She turned her attention to the computer behind the desk.

“Listen, I don’t have time for this.” Not true, but he was getting annoyed and she didn’t need to know his entire schedule. “Could you just tell me where I can find Merlin Emrys?”

“Right behind you.”

The voice. It sounded just like Cathal but smoother. Arthur turned to face its owner, and…

He knew he was about to face a better –because Merlin wasn’t homeless, so he should look better, or at least healthier – version of Cathal. But he was not prepared for that.

A boyish grin, high cheekbones and deep blue eyes looking at him; all framed by soft (Arthur was damned if that wasn't soft) dark brown hair.

“I’m Merlin.” Merlin offered his hand and Arthur took it without thinking.

When he met Cathal, Arthur thought Cathal could have been attractive if wasn’t for some details. And now he knew exactly what those details were. The drugs and the life on the streets had left Cathal too skinny to be healthy. That, and his eyes were always a bit glassy as if he were never completely sober.

Merlin was a whole different story. He was skinny, yes, but the healthy kind. His eyes were a shade of blue Arthur had never seen, it seemed like they could see right into a person’s soul. His smile was honest. His hair was longer than Cathal’s (a whole lot cleaner, too). And damn if he wasn’t just the perfect combination between hot and cute. It made it difficult to hate him.

Arthur realized he had been shaking Merlin’s hand for way too long and quickly let it go, breaking eye contact as he did so. The sudden absence of contact between them felt to Arthur as if he were getting out of his trance.

“I’m Arthur. I’m. I _was_ a friend of Cathal’s. He asked me to give you this.” He handed the letter to Merlin. And then just to remind himself he should hate Merlin instead of behaving like a high school kid with a crush he added. “I guess he already knew you would be too busy to go to his funeral.”

Merlin’s smile faded away.

Arthur didn’t know color could run so quickly out of someone’s face. Merlin gave a step back like he had just been punched. He sounded out of breath when he spoke.

“Cathal’s dead?”


	6. Chapter 6

Later Arthur would say it had been his spider sensors and Morgana would have mocked him from now to eternity if she ever knew. But in any way, if it hadn’t been for Arthur’s quick reflexes Merlin, who was clearly a clumsy fool (or was really in shock), would have fallen half inside the elevator right when its doors were about to close.

“Whoa! Be careful,” he said as he pulled Merlin back to his feet.

“Merlin. Oh my God!” Nimueh, who had remained so quiet until now that Arthur had completely forgotten about her, materialized at Merlin’s left side and started to rub his arm. “Are you okay?”

“Ca- Cathal,” he stuttered and blinked several times.

Nimueh gave Arthur a murderous look.

“Ok, you need to leave now.”

At that Merlin stepped out of his stupor and grabbed Arthur’s arm.

“If this is a joke, it’s not funny.” Then he started laughing and shaking his head. He let go of Arthur’s arm. “Of course you’re joking. That’s so Cathal. Let me guess what comes next. I get a phone call going ‘see, I might die anytime, so, what about some money?’” He kept laughing. Arthur was beginning to think he was insane.

“I’m not joking. Why would I joke about someone’s death?”

His expression must have told he was telling the truth because when Merlin looked at Arthur’s face again he stopped laughing and his expression became somber.

“When?”

“I’m gonna get you a glass of water,” Nimueh announced before walking back to her post and disappearing through a door behind her desk.

Merlin was still staring at Arthur, pressing his lips closed in a thin like.

“You didn’t know?” Arthur couldn’t believe that. How could Merlin not know?

“When?” Merlin repeated, in an emotionless tone. And now Arthur thought he was also bipolar because no one could change emotions like that.

“About a week ago,” he answered in a small voice.

They stared at each other for what it seemed like forever until Nimueh came back with something that looked like a goblet in her hands.

“Here, Merlin.”

Arthur observed as Merlin took the goblet from her hands and drank its content. He was shaking.

“Thanks” He finished drinking and returned the goblet to Nimueh. She left again.

“I’m sorry for you lost,” Arthur said. Because now that he had met Merlin and could see he wasn’t a soulless arse like Balinor that seemed like the right thing to say.

He turned to leave but Merlin stopped him.

“Please. Tell me what happened,” Merlin pleaded.

Arthur looked at his eyes. They were so innocent and pure like they belong to a child that had never seen the evils of this world. Even if Arthur wanted, he would never be able to deny anything asked with those eyes.

He nodded and Merlin called the lift.

***

 “I... haven’t been home since ma died.  Da and I – we’re too different from each other. He’s… traditional,” Merlin said with a sad smile.

They were in Merlin’s small flat. There were books everywhere. Merlin had to take a bunch of them off the sofa so that they could sit.  He offered coffee but Arthur denied politely.  He had told Merlin how he had met Cathal, Merlin didn’t even know his brother was homeless.

“Traditional?”

“Yeah. He wanted Cathal and me to be Dragonlords.”

“What?” Arthur couldn’t help but laugh. Merlin laughed too.

“I invented the name when I was little. Da owns a flight school; it’s called The Great Dragon.  He always said he wanted us to run the business, so I used to say the planes were dragons and I commanded them. I had a special language and everything.” He smiled to himself and stared at the coffee table like he was reliving those memories. Arthur was sure he was.

“Sounds fun.” It really did, he felt a bit jealous of Merlin’s childhood, he had thousands of toys but he never had a whole lot of imagination to create a world with them.

“It was.” Merlin’s smile faded. “Until the day I said I wanted to be a writer. He didn’t take me seriously, but then he saw my applications… He went mad. Start shouting stuff about following the family business, that the company passed from father to son since forever…” Merlin broke off with a sigh.

“What about Cathal?” Arthur asked, wondering how his late friend fit into all that.

“He was already working at The Great Dragon,” Merlin explained. “He only went to uni to learn how to take care of the business.”

And that was something Arthur could completely relate to. “I understand exactly how that is,” he told Merlin, “Father always made it perfectly clear I was to follow his footsteps. But different from you, that’s what I wanted.”

“Was it?” Merlin asked doubtfully. “Really? Did ever stop to really think about it? Because I used to think like that too. When I was a kid, I mean. But then I grew up and I just felt like that wasn’t, uh – ” He rubbed his neck with his left hand as if embarrassed. “This might sound stupid but I felt like it wasn’t my destiny.”

“Destiny?” Arthur looked suspiciously at Merlin, not sure if he was being serious.

Apparently, he was.

“Don’t you believe in destiny Arthur?”  Merlin asked, looking at Arthur in a way that made him change the answer he was about to give, and the words were out before Arthur could even fully register what he was saying:

 “I think I do now.”

They stayed silent for a moment after that.  Then Merlin shifted a little on the sofa and finally asked the question Arthur had been waiting for him to do all along.

“Arthur?”

“Yes?”

“How did he die?”

“Cathal was on drugs, Merlin.” After everything they had talked about Arthur suspect Merlin didn’t know about that either. “He had some problems with a dealer, and uh... He, uh --” Arthur couldn’t bring himself to say it, he couldn’t tell Merlin what he saw at the parking lot, what he imagined that happened there. He cleared his throat and tried again, “The uh – the official statement was that he had an overdose.”  

Perhaps one day Arthur would have to be more specific, but for now that seemed to be enough for Merlin, for he nodded. He hadn’t cried yet though, and Arthur had a feeling he was about to lose. But instead, Merlin got off the sofa and opened the front door.

Although he didn’t know that man, when Arthur realized he was about to get kicked out, he quickly wrote his number on a piece of paper and let it on the coffee table. He couldn’t explain why but Merlin aroused a feeling of protectiveness on him. And Arthur would not let him go through it alone when he finally breakdown.

He got up from the couch before Merlin could say something to him and walked toward the door.

“If you need anything,” he said, jutting his chin in the direction of the piece of paper.

“Thanks.”

“You’re welcome,” Arthur replied to the closed door.

***

 “That’s so sad.”

Morgana had dragged Arthur to one of their favorite pubs, and had – from the moment they had sat down – proceeded to extract every single detail about Arthur’s involvement with the Emrys family.

“I swear to God, Morgana,” he promised after he finished telling her how Merlin wasn’t even aware of Cathal’s situation. “I’ll never complain about our father again.”

Arthur raised his beer in a toast.

Morgana mirrored him. “Cheers.” 

 “Now, why don’t you give me motives to run back to Dublin and never come back,” Arthur asked, changing the subject to something a little less gloomy, although just as stressful.

Morgana, of course, knew exactly what he meant by that. “You mean you want to know about the company?” Arthur nodded, leaning back on his booth and taking another sip of his beer. “Well, brace yourself, dear brother,” she said with a smirk, “boredom is coming.”

They talked for hours. Morgana told him about how their uncle Agravaine was acting like he owned the place and how she had to control herself not to tell him to fuck off every single meeting. She also told him that Leon and she were trying to have a baby. That made Arthur’s night. He had always wanted to be an uncle.

“I’ll be the Godfather.”

“Whatever Don Pendragone.”

“Kiss the ring,” Arthur said, shoving a hand in front of her face. Morgana swatted the hand way from her and, suddenly, they were both caught in a fit of laughter, which they only managed to subdue when Arthur’s mobile began to ring.

It was an unknown number.

“Hello?”

“Arthur?” Merlin. “Arthur, I read the letter I…” There was a hiccup, Merlin’s voice sounded weird. He was either crying or drunk. Arthur suspected both.

“Merlin, are you home?”

At Morgana’s quizzed look he mouthed “drunk”. She just nodded.

“I sh- I should’ve been there for him, Arthur. I’m a selfish bastard.” Arthur could clearly hear him sobbing. He was getting really concerned.

“Merlin, are you home?” He repeated.

“Yes, I’m. I’m home. I’m alone. I don’t want to be alone, Arthur. Don’t leave me alone.” Another hiccup. “Please.”

The phone went silent. 


	7. Chapter 7

The front door was open when he got there. Arthur took that as an invitation and let himself in.

“Merlin?” he called as he entered the living room and found it empty.

There was no answer.

“Merlin?” Arthur tried again, heading to the kitchen.

“He was always there for me.” Merlin was sitting on the kitchen floor; he was staring at an empty bottle that he was spinning in his hands. He wasn’t crying but there were tears tracks down his cheekbones.

Arthur felt uncomfortable standing there so he sat on the floor next to Merlin.

“Did you drink all that?” Arthur asked pointing to the bottle, desperately trying to find something to fill the silence that followed Merlin’s statement.

“It was only half full,” Merlin answered. He gave a humorless laugh. “Cathal could drink a whole barrel like it was water. Guess that’s just another thing he was better than me.” He stayed silent for a few seconds then said, “I’m such a coward. I ran away. And yet, he still loved me. He said that, in his letter. The last three words my brother said to me. ‘Love you, Merls.’” His voice started to shake more and more as he spoke. “Now, you tell me, Arthur. Tell me. How could he still love me? How? I left him behind. I wasn’t there when he needed me the most.”

And then he was crying again. There were big fat tears running down his face. He turned his head and looked at Arthur with the brightest blue eyes Arthur had ever seen.

“Tell me, Arthur. How could he still love me after I left him alone?”

Arthur’s breath got caught up in his throat. He didn’t know how to answer that. Merlin looked so fragile, so broken that Arthur felt like hugging him, and since he had no words to comfort the young man, he did it. He put his arms around Merlin’s shoulders and Merlin gave in to him. He started to shake, he grabbed Arthur’s waist with the strength of a drowning man. Arthur could feel Merlin’s tears soaking his shirt but he didn’t care.

“Shhh. It’s gonna be ok. I’m here,” he said as he rubbed gentle circles on Merlin’s back.

It took a while but eventually, Merlin stopped shaking. He took his head out of Arthur’s chest and looked up at him. His eyes were red and his face was a bit swollen from crying but he seemed calmer.

“That’s better,” Arthur said with a sympathetic smile.

“I’m drunk. Sorry about your shirt.”

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it. Uh, maybe we should get off the floor, I mean, if you’re okay.”

They stared at each other for a long time before Merlin answered.

“Yeah, yeah. Sure.”

They got up and Merlin put the empty bottle in the sink. He did look better, and not at all embarrassed by his meltdown, which impressed Arthur (who wasn’t used to showing his feelings, especially not to strangers), but then again, Merlin was drunk. 

“I should go home and let you get some rest, you look like you ne--”

And then Merlin threw up in the sink before Arthur could finish his sentence.

“Or maybe I should stay a little longer,” he decided after Merlin had stopped putting his guts out.

“No, please. You’ve done a lot already, I should get off your foot.”

“What about all that talk about not wanting to be alone?” Arthur didn’t want to leave Merlin to drown in his own vomit. He looked clumsy enough to do that.

“I think I sobered up a little.”

“Well then, I’m hungry. I was having dinner when you called. So how about you make it up to me with pizza. What do you say?”

Merlin seemed to consider the idea for a few seconds before he answered.

“I say yes.” And there was that smile again, it made Arthur’s heart skip a beat.

***

 “How can someone so thin eat so much?” They had ordered two large pizzas and Merlin had finished one of them all by himself.

“I was hungry, too,” he said with his mouth full, “Haven’t eaten anything since morning!”

“Manners, Merlin. Swallow your food before you speak.”

“I’m in _my_ house, you clotpole. I eat whatever way I want.” And just to prove his point he licked his index.

Arthur swallowed hard.

Merlin, clueless of the effects he was causing, continued licking his other fingers as he spoke.

“People should be comfortable in their own houses. Especially now, that I’m the only one living here. I mean, of course, I was comfortable with Gwen, she’s my best friend after all. But she’s a girl, and you know, girls with all that cleaning obsession. I hope she’s not driving Lance made, he’s a nice bloke…”

Gwen. Lance. Those two names had, thankfully, taken Arthur out of the trance Merlin’s fingers had put him before he embarrassed himself by letting his body follow the track of the thoughts he was having about them. He shook his head a little to clear his mind. That was when it hit him.

Gwen. Lance.

“Merlin!”

“… his ex-boyfriend was a royal arse. What?” Arthur hadn’t even realized he was still talking.

“When you say Gwen and Lance, you mean Guinevere and Lancelot?”

“Yes. Do you know them?”

“I don’t know Guinevere, but I know Lance pretty well.”

“Oh, that’s a crazy coincidence, Gwen was my roommate, but now that she’s pregnant she’s moved in with Lance. But never mind, you must know that already.” Arthur was curious to know if it was the booze or if Merlin always talked like he was in competition to see who could say more words per second. “So, where did you know Lance from?”

Arthur was so amazed by how small the world was and how all the pieces of his life seemed to lead him to Merlin, that he simply smiled and answered,

“I’m the royal arse.”

 


	8. Chapter 8

“Oh! Sorry for that. Those were my words. Not Lance’s. Is just… He looked so miserable at that time.”

“Yeah, so miserable he became straight.” Arthur didn’t hold any bad feelings against Lance anymore, but still, he couldn’t help the bitterness when he thought about how Lance had left him when he needed him the most.

“Have to agree with you, mate. I’d have offered him my shoulder to cry on,” Merlin said laughing. “Seriously, how could you let him go? Have you seen that face?”

“Clearly you didn’t get the whole story. _He_ left me.”

“That’s not what he said. He said he didn’t see you for months. You just took off.”

“ _My father_ was sick!” Arthur exclaimed, a little bit louder than he intended to. Then he lowered his voice and said sarcastically, “Or did Lance forget to mention that? He needed me!”

“And so did Lance!”

Arthur laughed bitterly. “He didn’t look like he had terminal cancer the last time I saw him.”

“I know Arthur, I get it. You had to take care of your dad. But three months, Arthur! How would you feel if your partner simply left for three months without a word? He had to leave you a letter because he didn’t know when he was going to see you again.”

They had both raised their voices and now they were practically shouting at each other.

“Exactly Merlin, a letter. Those were the worst months of my life. When I wasn’t working I was in the hospital with father, I barely slept. And just so you know, we used to talk on the phone every night. But then he stopped answering me so I go home and what do I find? A letter! Now tell me, how’d you feel if the person you gave your heart to dumped you with a freaking letter when you most need them?”

Merlin said nothing. Suddenly the pizza felt too heavy in Arthur’s stomach. He got up from the brown couch for the second time that day. But this time he didn’t feel sorry for leaving Merlin alone.

***

Arthur's apartment looked like one of those show rooms where people could see how their house would look like after it was done. It had no life, no personal touch. But to be honest, Arthur hadn't been there for a long time.  He bought it when he started university, then he had moved in with Lance after graduation. He came back after their break up but he used to spend all his time with Uther back then.  After his father’s death he only stayed there for a couple of weeks before going to Dublin, so he couldn’t really complain about the lack of life, or food, in the place.

He also couldn’t stay at Uther’s any longer. He didn’t want to go there in the first place. He’d go and buy everything he needed tomorrow. At that moment he just wanted to be somewhere of his own.

 

***

 

It was a Saturday so Arthur allowed himself to stay in bed until midday. He had to pick his stuff at his father’s and then go shopping. And turn his fridge on. 

After one more glance at the clock on the nightstand, he got off the bed and made his way to the bathroom with no hurry. It was only when he closed the shower that he realized his clothes were all in his bags. At Uther’s. Arthur cursed at his shampoos.

Fortunately, he found a pair of old jeans and a polo shirt in the closet, no socks though. Arthur didn’t ever bother to look for underwear. He washed and tried his best to dry his boxers with the iron. The day did not start well.

 

***

When he got to Uther’s Arthur had to park the car behind the red Porsche. Merlin was right. There was definitely a destiny. And it was a fucking bitch.

He almost didn’t have time to get out of the car and she was already hugging him.

“Arthur! Oh, how I’ve missed you, love! How have you been?” Catrina said as she suffocated him with her arms wrapped tightly around his neck.

“Go-od,” he answered as he gently tried to push her off.

“Oh, look at you!” She exclaimed, running her hands down his chest. Luckily, she stopped just inches from his waistline. “So skinny! I bet you haven’t been eating properly.” Catrina grabbed one of Arthur’s hands and tugged him along with her toward the house. “Come on, let’s have some lunch.”

He should’ve stayed in bed.

After eating food enough for a football team Arthur finally managed to escape upstairs and grab his things. He was about to leave when Catrina found him again.

“I know I shouldn’t keep coming here.” She said as he closed the boot door. He turned to face her.

“No! It’s okay, really. No one comes here anyway. It’s good that you take care of the place,” Arthur tried to reassure her with a smile.

“Is just – I have such good memories from the time I lived in this house,” Catrina confessed with an lungful sigh. “Why don’t you or Morgana live here? It’s a great place.”

“I think this house is too big for a single person. And Morgana never liked here.”

“Nonsense. I’m sure once one of you starts having children you’ll fight to see who gets the house.  You’re right about this not being a place for a single person. This is a place for a family.” She smiled at him. “Let me know if you get tired of me coming here, dear. See you!” And with the Catrina entered her own car and left Arthur standing there, his mind going over her words.

A place for a family. Arthur didn’t want to be rude so he didn’t tell her that the reason why Morgana never liked the place was that after their mother died they were practically raised by nannies and tutors, not to mention the three step-mothers. Uther was never home. It didn’t feel like a family for neither of them, but Morgana was three years older than him and she remembered what the Pendragon household used to be like.

For his part Arthur always loved the house where he grew up but it was too big for him to live alone, and he didn’t see a family any future soon. Maybe he should ask the Troll if she wanted to buy it.

***

 

After leaving the bags at the flat Arthur made a list of everything he needed and went to the supermarket. He was still thinking about selling the house so he called Morgana to ask for her opinion as he drove the trolley through the aisles.

“Guess who I saw today?” He asked when she answered the phone.

 _“She hugged you, didn’t she?”_  Sometimes Arthur was sure his sister was psychic.

“Like a bear.” They both laughed. “Listen, I was thinking.”

 _“Never a good sign,”_ Morgana teased.

“Shut up and listen. I was thinking about selling father’s house to Catrina. What do you think?” He held the phone between his shoulder and his ear so that he could take a cereal box from the shelf.

_“I’d have done that months ago if it was up to me, but you love that house, don’t even try to denial. Why do you want to get rid of it?”_

“It’s too big for me alone. Anyway, what do you think?” He asked again taking the mobile back in his hand and going to the next aisle.

_“I think you’re going to regret it.”_

“Why?”

_“Because when you start a family you won’t want to live in a flat. Terrible place to raise kids.”_

“You’re all about children now, aren’t you?” He teased her as he grabbed one more thing that was on his list. “I don’t even know if I’ll have kids one day.”

_“Of course you will. I’m only doing this once, and I’m so no having twins. So, you need to give me nephews or nieces so that my kid has kids to play with. I don’t want him or her to grow up alone.”_

“I can’t believe you just said that. Just for that I’ve decided I won’t have kids, never. And if I change my mind I won’t let them play with your evil creation.”

_“Fuck you.”_

Arthur was passing through the beverages section when he saw a bottle of the whiskey Merlin drank the day before.

“Anyway, forget about that. I have to tell you how things went with MERLIN!”

Destiny was definitely trying to fuck with him today.

Arthur almost hit him with the trolley as turned to the next aisle.

“Arthur?” Morgana and Merlin said at the same time.

“Hey,” he answered raising an eyebrow.

 _“Arthur? What the hell?”_ Morgana asked again.

“I shouldn’t have let you leave like that last night. Things I said – I think we should talk.”  And there he was, talking fast and almost without breathing.

Merlin was wearing a dark green hood two sizes too big. He looked better than he had the night before. There was a box of frozen lasagna in his hands. Uni student food, Arthur thought.

“I’m not a rude person. And I was terribly rude to you, which is unforgivable. Especially after everything you did for Cathal and for me. So, what do you say? Will you give me a chance to redeem myself?” He asked with a grin.

 _“Arthur?”_ Morgana shouted through the phone.

“Talk to you later.” Arthur blurted before hanging up on her.


	9. Chapter 9

“I still have to finish here,” Arthur said, putting his mobile in his pocket.

“Okay. Uh, I could help? Here, give me the list.” Arthur wondered if one day he’d understand why he didn’t have it in him to deny Merlin’s requests.  He passed the list to Merlin.

“Fine. What’s next?”

“Tomatoes?” He asked, showing the list to Arthur.

“What? You don’t understand my letter?”

“No, it’s just. You don’t look like someone who buys fresh stuff.”

“Why not? I like cooking. Besides, I’ve passed the time when food came in boxes.” He pointed to Merlin’s lasagna.

Merlin shrugged. “It’s cheap, it’s quick. What’s wrong?”

“The taste.”

“You’re posh,” Merlin accused with a grin, and then added, “And old.”

Arthur snorted a laugh. “Old? I’m twenty-eight! How’s that old?”

“I’m twenty-one,” Merlin revealed, still smiling with mischief. “It’s pretty old for me.”

“Oh, shut up, Merlin,” Arthur shot back, though there was no real heat in it.

They both laughed.

Then Merlin turned serious again. “Hey, listen. About yesterday. I shouldn’t have said those things to you. I wish I could blame it on the alcohol, but you saw me throwing up, and by the time we ate I was a lot soberer.” Merlin must have seen the look on Arthur’s face because he stopped talking. “What?”

“You’re doing it again!”

“Doing what?”

“Talking like you have a limit to. Breathe.”

Blushing slightly, Merlin looked down at his Converses as he mumbled, “Sorry. I, I think you make me nervous.”  He risked a glance at Arthur after a few seconds of silence.

“And why’s that?” Arthur’s voice came out low and a bit worked up.

“I don’t know,” Merlin answered looking at his eyes, he was still blushing and the tip of his ears had turned an intense shade of pink.

They stayed like that, staring at each other in the middle of the produce section for a long time until the speaker above their heads started announcing the offers of the day.

Arthur cleared his throat. “Er. I think I’ve got it all.”

Merlin looked at the full trolley.

“You’re feeding an army or something?”

“Haven’t been home in a long time,” Arthur explained.

They went to the cashiers in a not-so-comfortable silence, and luckily they found a free one. Arthur’s day was starting to get better. He let Merlin go first since he only had one item.

“Are you doing something tonight?” Merlin asked as he paid for his lasagna.

“Um, I was planning on cleaning my place. Don’t know how long is gonna take.”

“Oh my God, Arthur!” Merlin exclaimed putting his hands in the pocket of his hood as he rocked on his heels. “Don’t be such an old man. It’s Saturday!”

Arthur found it adorable the way Merlin pronounced the word ‘man’ with his Irish accent. Although what actually came out of his mouth was, “Why do you care so much? Do you have some big plans or something?”

“Not big,” Merlin admitted, “but way better than cleaning. My mates and I usually go to this pub near Campus on Saturdays, to drink and play pool. So, what do you say?  Join us?”

“Um, I’d feel out of place. I don’t know your mates. I barely know you!” Arthur answered as he put his grocery on bags.

“So here’s your chance!” Merlin grinned. “Come on, Arthur. I like you, I think if we give it a chance we probably get on.”

Arthur finish packing, he paid the cashier and turned to Merlin. “You’re sure?” For some reason he couldn’t explain, he needed to know if Merlin really meant it.

“Of course!”  Merlin reassured him with an even bigger grin.

“Fine,” Arthur obliged at last. “But just because I _have_ to see you playing pool. For some reason, I’m sure you’re rubbish.”

“Just you wait and see. You don’t know my talents Arthur –” he stopped abruptly. “Hey, I don’t know your last name.”

“Pendragon.” Arthur supplied idly while they headed to the parking lot.

“Pendragon? Like the company?”

“Yeah, like the company.” Arthur counted in his mind to see how long it’d take Merlin to put the pieces together.

He was on five when Merlin said, “It’s yours, isn’t it?”

Arthur nodded, they had reached his car, and he started putting his things inside.

“Holy crap, you’re rich!”

“Does it bother you?” He asked with his head inside the boot, trying to organize his grocery. “Pass me that, will you?”

Merlin started to give him the bags. “No. No problem. It’s just surprising,” he admitted, “that’s all.”

“I figured you’d know. You’re friends with Lancelot.” Once they finished with the bags Arthur shut the boot door and turned to look at Merlin.

“No. All he said was that you had money. A lot. But I didn’t know it was that much!” He stayed silent for a couple of seconds and then Merlin shouted, scaring the life out of Arthur. “Oh my God. You’re dad died!”

“Yes, Merlin. I told you that.” Arthur rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, but your dad is Uther Pendragon. It was on the news.”

“You’re amazing Merlin Emrys!” He laughed and shook his head. “Come on, I’ll give you a ride home.”

“And how do you know I don’t have a car?” Merlin teased.

“Do you?” He asked as he opened the driver’s door, raising an eyebrow.

“You know the address,” Merlin said opening the passenger door and dropping onto the seat unceremoniously.

He was pouting a little, and Arthur laughed. “Go on, tell me what time I should pick you tonight.”

“Prat.”

They left the supermarket and Arthur took the route that led to Merlin’s flat. Again, he admitted to himself that Merlin was right. They’d totally get along if they gave it a chance. But while Merlin explained his plans for the night, Arthur wondered exactly what kind of way he wanted to ‘get along’ with him.

 

***

 

“So, you have a date.”

“Is not a date!”

When Arthur got home he called Leon to ask for the number of his housekeeper. He’d have called his sister but he wanted to catch up with his best friend. Twenty minutes after he called Leon showed up. Meanwhile, Arthur had called the housekeeper and asked her to come on Monday. Now they were drinking tea at Arthur’s kitchen.

“He said his mates will be there. Is definitely not a date.” Arthur repeated, taking another sip of his tea.

 “If you say so. But listen, why the sudden interest? He barely knows you. There’s something in there. I think he’s into you.”

Arthur didn’t know how to answer that. He wouldn’t admit it but he had thought about that, too.

“Um, Arthur?”

“What?” He raised his eyes from the mug.

“You said he is friends with Lancelot.”

“Yes, so?”

“And you said he invited you to go out with his mates…”

“Oh, fuck,” Arthur cursed, following Leon’s track of thoughts. “Do you think?” Leon shrugged. “Should I call him and ask? Would it be awkward?”

“I don’t know, man. It’ll definitely be awkward meeting Du Lac.” He finished the tea and got up to put the cup in the sink.

“You know what? Why don’t _you_ come with me? That way I will know someone there besides Merlin, and I won’t feel so out.”

“And blow up your date? Nah! Think I’ll pass.” Arthur shot him a murderous look and he raised his hand in defense.  “Not a date. I got it. Not a date.  But really, I can’t. I’ve got plans with your sister. We’re trying to get her pregnant, you know.”

“Thanks, Leon. This is just what I needed, to know that you and Morgana are gonna shag tonight. Thanks very fucking much.”

“That’s the plan.” He gave filthy smile.

“Oh, you’re disgusting.”

Leon laughed.

“Anyway, you’re coming back on Monday, right? Morgana said she told you about your uncle. What are you gonna do?”

“Yes, I’m. And about Agravaine, is not like I can sack him just because he’s being an arse.”

“I’m sure he was only acting like that because you weren’t around. He’ll behave now.”

“He’ll pretend.” Arthur sighed. “Relatives.” Arthur pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers.  He could feel a headache coming just from the mention of that name.

When he opened his eyes Leon was glancing at his watch.

“I should get going. Don’t want to get you late for your da— never mind. See you Monday, mate.”

Arthur walked him to the door.

“See you, mate.”

 

***

It was exactly 7:30 pm when Arthur showed up at Merlin’s door. He wasn’t ready.

“Just a minute!” He said as he opened the door and immediately turned his back to Arthur. He had only a towel wrapped around his waist. Arthur stared at the pale skin of Merlin’s back, the drops of water running down from his bare shoulders. He stared until Merlin disappeared through a door Arthur suspected it was his bedroom. 

“Take your time,” Arthur said a little louder so that Merlin could hear from wherever he was. He needed the time himself, to get his heart rate back in order.

“I’m sorry,” Merlin shouted back. “I slept the whole afternoon, didn’t sleep well last night.”

Then Arthur remembered his conversation with Leon and a thought occurred to him. “Merlin? Did you invite Lancelot?”

“I didn’t invite anyone except you.” Arthur’s heart skipped a beat at that, but then Merlin crashed whatever hope was rising in his mind. “We always go there, remember. I told you, we’re friends. No one needs an invitation.  Oh, and answering your question.” He came out of the chamber and Arthur’s jaw nearly fell all over again. Merlin was just drop dead gorgeous. He was wearing a dark blue plaid shirt and a leather jacket; his jeans were also dark and a size shy from skinny. “Lance is not coming. You know, I’m starting to think you didn’t date him at all. Or did you forget he doesn’t drink?”

“I know he doesn’t drink,” Arthur said, sounding like a stubborn child to his own ears. “But that’s not a reason not to come. We used to go out to pubs. There are more things to do other than drinking.”

“Yeah. But you haven’t met Gwaine. He makes you _want_ to drink. I think the temptation is too strong,  even for a saint like Lance. I’m ready, let’s go.”

They left the apartment and Arthur called the lift while Merlin closed the door.

“What do you mean?”

The elevator arrived and they got inside.

“You’ll see. He’s not bad, though. He’s just. Gwaine.”

“You make it sound bad.”

“It’s not, really. Just. Don’t take him seriously.”

“Okay then.”

They got to the reception and Merlin wave a goodbye to Nimueh. Arthur chose to ignore her.

“Come on, then. Give me the directions,” Arthur asked as they entered the car and took off.

 

***

Arthur easily found the pub, but since it was Saturday night it took him about ten minutes to find a place to park. When he finally found a spot it was almost two blocks away from the pub. 

Merlin’s friends were already there, sitting in a booth on the corner, close to the pools.

“Hi, everyone. This is Arthur!” There were three guys and two girls, Merlin pointed and introduced each one of them. “Arthur, these are Percival,” he said pointing to the tall, muscular bloke on the left edge, “And his girlfriend, Mithian.” He pointed to the brunette on Percival’s side, and then to the lad with messy hair and the blond girl. “These are Will and Elena, also dating. And last but not least,” Merlin pointed the bloke with shaggy brown hair that went until his shoulders, “Gwaine.” 

Gwaine, Arthur thought, came from the same factory as Lance. Not that they looked alike, but they were both ridiculously hot. Merlin was hot too, but his type of beauty was very specific. Men like Lancelot and this Gwaine were everybody’s type. One had to be blind not to like them.

Gwaine smirked at Merlin, and suddenly Arthur understood what he meant about the man. “New boyfriend, Merlin?”

“Don’t start.” They set down with the group, Merlin between Arthur and Gwaine.

“Don’t mind him,” Percival said, looking at Arthur. “Just do like the rest of us.”

“Yeah, we have two options,” supplied Will. “Either ignore him or drink ‘till he’s funny.”

“Since ignoring him is a little difficult, we usually go for the second one,” Mithian said grinning. “I’ll fetch us some drinks, come on love. Give me a hand.”

Everyone laughed as Percival and Mithian went to the bar. They all seemed like nice people and Arthur felt instantly comfortable around them; except, of course, for Gwaine.

“Did anyone notice Merlin haven’t denied what I said?” He asked.

“I’m not his boyfriend.”

“Alright then, what are you?”

“Gwaine!” Merlin reprehended.

“It’s okay, Merlin. I’m his friend.”

“I know all his friends. And I’ve never heard of you.”

He was jealous, Arthur could see. But since Merlin didn’t say anything he doubted there was anything between the two of them.

“Come on, Gwaine. Your jealousy is showing,” Elena teased.

“No, guys. There’s something I have to tell you.” Merlin turned to his friends. “You know I’ve been weird since yesterday, right.”

“Yeah, you asked me to cover for you with that creepy Mordred kid,” Will said. “And then you ignored my texts. What happened?”

“My brother, he passed away.”  Merlin had that miserable look on his face again so Arthur gave his thigh a quick squeeze. Gwaine noticed and raised an eyebrow at him. Merlin gave him a grateful smile.

Around the table, all Merlin’s friends exploded in ‘ohs’ and ‘Merlins’ holding his hands and shooting him sympathetic looks. Mithian and Percival got back at that moment.

“What happened?” She asked, sitting and putting the beers on the table.

“Merlin’s brother died,” Gwaine answered.

“Oh my God, Merlin. When was it?”

“A week ago. Arthur was the one who told me, he—”

“I was a friend of Cathal’s,” he interrupted.  The night was supposed to be fun for Merlin, and it’d be nothing like that if he started to explain his brother’s situation. Merlin seemed to understand and he settled for that, smiling sadly at Arthur.

“Don’t want to talk about it. No tonight.”

“Ok, so who wants to play truth or dare?” Gwaine asked.

Will stood up. “I’m definitely not drunk enough for that. Who want’s vodka?” Everyone shook their heads and he went alone to the bar.

***

“Merlin! Truth or dare. Are you a virgin?” Elena asked.

 They were in the fifth round. They had stopped on the third to play pool but after losing twice for Merlin and Gwaine, Arthur decided to go back to the table.

“Like you lot don’t know,” Merlin answered blushing.

“You have to answer!” Will said.

“Oh, come on. He’s twenty-one!” Arthur said with a voice higher than he intended. The booze was starting to affect him.

“You clearly don’t know him,” Gwaine said, looking at Merlin.

“And all that talk about Lance’s face?” Arthur asked Merlin. “That wasn’t very innocent.”

“I’m virgin, not a monk,” Merlin cried.

“Why?”

“Why I’m not a monk? Well…”

“No. Not that.”

“Well, guess I never met the right person. Bloke. The right bloke. I’ve already gotten to the second base with a girl, though.”

“Really?” Arthur was shocked, he didn’t know if it was for the virginity or the girl. Probably both.

“Yeah. Michele O’ Regan. I was 16. And drunk. And she thought I was Cathal. But I totally went to second base with her.” He took another sip of his beer.

“Why you didn’t go further?” Percival asked.

“I don’t know. ‘Cause I’m gay, I suppose.” He shrugged.

“You’re pathetic, Emrys,” Will said, laughing. “Well, guess we should get going, right El? We have that thing, remember – We’re late.”

“Right, totally.”

They got up and wave their goodbyes. As soon as they were out of earshot Gwaine said.

“They’re going to shag.” Then he got up from his seat. “And so will I. Merlin?” He offered a hand to him.

“Dream on.”

“Whatever. Blond over there’s been looking at me all night.” He pointed to a girl sitting across from them that remembered Arthur of Vivian. He winced.

“Good luck,” he said Gwaine.

“Don’t need it,” Gwaine answered, finishing his drink and leaving.

“We should go too. I’m sleepy,” Mithian said as she covered her yawn with her hand.

“It was nice to meet you, Arthur. Bring him next time Merlin,” Percival said as he and his girlfriend got up.

“If he wants to,” Merlin said. “Good night, guys!

“Good night. It was nice to meet you, too,” Arthur said as they left. Then he turned to Merlin. “I think we should get going, too.”

“Yeah, sure!”

They paid and headed to Arthur’s car.

“Are you sure you’re okay to drive? We could split a cab?” Merlin asked in the middle of the way.

“I’m fine. I’m an excellent driver.”

“Yeah, but you drank a lot.”

“I’m not a lightweight like you, Merlin.”  He teased.

“You’re more like Gwaine than you realize.”

“I’m nothing like him,” Arthur quickly defended himself. Then he added. “He likes you.”

“No.” Merlin laughed. “He flirts with everything that breathes.”

“I breathe, and he didn’t flirt with me. Actually, I think he wanted to chop my head off. He was completely jealous.”

“You’re imagining things,” Merlin said, putting his hands in his pockets. Then he tripped over his own feet. Arthur caught him by the waist before he crashed on the ground. “Whoa!”

“You should quit drinking, Merlin. Seriously –” He started to say as he put Merlin back on his feet but then their eyes met and he forgot what he was saying. They were in each other’s personal space.

Merlin licked his lips and Arthur’s eyes followed the track of his tongue. His hands were still holding Merlin’s waist.

“You – I –” Arthur started again but before he could form any coherent sentence Merlin closed the small distance between their bodies and shut him up with his mouth.


	10. Chapter 10

The kiss was gentle, chaste. Arthur had no idea how long they stayed like that. Millenniums could have passed or maybe just a few seconds. It didn’t matter.

When they broke apart Merlin smiled, embarrassed, he scratched the back of his head as he spoke.

“Hey, um, thank you for helping me out of the Cathal subject, don’t feel like telling the guys just yet.”

“You’re welcome, and thanks for not mentioning me and Lancelot,” Arthur replied, feeling awkward. “We should, uh, we should go. It’s, uh, cold here.” He said rubbing his arms.

They started to walk again. Arthur didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what the kiss meant.

“Yeah, Lance is new at the group. Actually, he only went out with all of us a few times, I don’t even know if they consider him as part of the group. He’s more like a stay home type of bloke, you know,” Merlin started rambling about as they walked. Arthur suspected he was just as embarrassed.

They reached the car and got in, remaining in silence the whole way to Merlin’s home. It wasn’t long before Arthur was parking in front of the building. He stopped the car and turned to Merlin.

“Here you go! Safe and sound!” _What the hell_ was wrong with him, Arthur thought. Why was he so nervous? It was only just a quick touch of lips, in fact, now that his mind was clearer, Arthur thought he couldn’t even classify that as an actual kiss.

Merlin smiled at him and opened the door.

“Thanks for coming. It was brilliant,” he said, his hand on the door handle.

“I’m the one who should be thanking you. I had a lot of fun tonight. It’s been so long since I’ve done anything like that. And your friends are great.” He grinned and added, “Even Gwaine.”

“Told you; he isn’t a bad person. Actually, he’s the reason I met them all. He was the first person I met when I came to London. He helped me a lot,” Merlin said, and Arthur could feel he meant every word. All the teasing and jokes apart, Merlin really cared about Gwaine. 

“I thought Guinevere was your best friend.”

“She is,” Merlin agreed. “Well, female best friend.”

Arthur shook his head and laughed. “You’re a wonder, Merlin Emrys.”

Merlin chuckled softly. “Thanks, I think.” He looked down at his lap for a moment then tilted up his head to look at Arthur through his lashes. “I better get inside. Will you get home safe?”

“Brought you here in one piece, didn’t I?” Arthur joked, giving Merlin’s arm a light punch.

“Alright, then. Goodnight, Arthur.” He started to exit the car but then stopped, turned back and planted another barely-there kiss on Arthur’s lips, adding. “Let’s keep in touch.” Before leaving the car, slamming its door shut.

Ok, so the kiss definitely meant something. But what, Arthur didn’t know. Was that the start of something?

“Well, he asked me to keep in touch so, guess we’ll find out,” Arthur said to himself, or to the car.

He really needed to get home.

 

***

 

On Sunday Arthur woke up with a hangover.

He glanced at the clock on the nightstand.  10:23 a.m. Arthur groaned and sank back onto his pillow. He covered his head with his blanket, determined to stay there until 10:30. He knew it was stupid, he wouldn’t get any more sleep in seven minutes, but it just seemed nicer to say he woke up at exactly 10:30. Not that he had to tell anyone what time he woke up, though. 

As he waited, he tried to remember all the events from last night. It had been a while since he drank that much, never mind how long since he had had that much fun. Hell, he didn’t even want to try and remember the last time he kissed someone. Last time _someone_ kissed him.

At exactly 10:30 a.m. Arthur got out of bed and went to find something for his headache.  He took an Advil and went shower.

As he let the water wash the sleep out of his body, Arthur thought about what he had to face the next day. It would be the first time he would be completely and entirely on his own.  Sure, when Uther left to take care of himself Arthur was the one in charge, but that was only inside the building. It was always his father who had the final word.  Now that was Arthur’s duty.  He wouldn’t admit to anyone, not even to himself, but deep down – not so deep down actually – he was a bit terrified. 

His father was a great leader; he started from nothing and created an empire in last than two decades. Uther was good, but he was also antiqued. Ever since Arthur had entered Pendragon Inc. almost all of his ideas had been shut down. Now though, he could work on the changes he had always wanted to do, along with some new projects he kept on the bottom drawer of his office desk because he had never had the courage to show it to his father. It was a bit exciting, actually, but still very fucking terrifying.

Arthur finished his bath and brushed his teeth. He then went to the kitchen to make some coffee. None of his things were in place but since he had already called for a housekeeper he didn’t bother much. He decided to do a presentation for Monday to formally introduce himself as the new head of the company; he found his laptop in one of his bags and put his mind to work.

 

***

As it turned out Merlin’s idea of keeping in touch was something that, for Arthur, only teenagers did.

Texting. A lot of texting.

The first one came when he was on the third page of a Word document. 

**_Morning!!! Afternoon? Is it? Afternoon? Anyways, what r u doin? Smth boring, I’m sure. I’m bored too, so entertain me._ **

Arthur wasn’t sure how to answer that after what happened the night before so he set for a safe ground.

**_Its 11:58.Technically is still morning. And FYI I’m working, don’t have time to entertain u._ **

He hit send before he could think too much. Merlin’s answer came quickly.

**_What did I say? Boring!! Stop being boring, cmon.  u promised 2 keep in touch._ **

**_1 My work isn’t boring. 2  I didn’t promise anything. 3 dont u have anything better to do?_ **

Arthur reluctantly added the third topic. He was enjoying that, but wouldn’t admit it to Merlin.

**_Every work on Sunday is boring. I have an essay due tomorrow. I’m procrastinating._ **

Arthur smiled at his mobile, he didn’t miss the fact Merlin ignored his second topic. 

**_Go do your homework, Merlin!_ **

**_HOMEWORK??? What am I? A kid?_ **

Although he couldn’t see him, Arthur could picture the indignant face he was sure Merlin was doing.  It made his smile grow bigger.

**_You’re the one who said I’m old. So compared to me u r a child._ **

Arthur corrected a few spelling mistakes in his presentation while he waited for Merlin’s answer. Then he saved his work and closed the laptop. He wouldn’t get any more work done now, anyway.

 It wasn’t long before his mobile was vibrating again.

**_Prat. Using what I said against me!!! Didnt expect that from u. So, when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

_Whenever you want_ , Arthur wanted to answer. But he _was_ a prat. And damn if wasn’t going to play hard to get. He completed ignored Merlin’s question.

**_Today I woke up at exactly 10:30 w/o alarm_ **

Turn out he had someone to tell that completely random fact of his morning. Even if it was only to piss him off.

**_so what, why r u telling me this? when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

**_Ok, sorry. I’m lying. I woke up at 10:23. But to be honest I only left bed at 10:30._ **

He was getting hungry, so he took the cell phone and went to the kitchen to make a sandwich.

**_Still irrelevant. when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

**_Do you wanna know what I did next? Of course u do, that’s y u texted me, to entertain u. I showered._ **

Arthur hit send and let the mobile on top of the counter. He went to the fridge and started picking things up for his sandwich.

**_U think u r so funny. Stop deflating. when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

He read Merlin’s message but didn’t answered, taking his time to prepare the sandwich.  After he finished he send _lunch_ for Merlin taking his plate, a napkin, and the mobile to the living room.

**_Is that your answer? when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

He took a bite at the sandwich and wiped his hands on the napkin before answering.

**_That’s what I’m doing right now. I’m entertaining u with my routine._ **

**_You really are an arse, aren’t u? when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

Merlin was getting irritated. Arthur laughed.

**_Yes, I’m aware.  Movie._ **

Arthur turned the TV on. Merlin took so long to answer that he had time to finish eating the whole sandwich before the mobile lights flashed on again.

**_And now you’re watching a film. What happened to ‘I’m working’? when we’re seeing each other again?_ **

Arthur went back to the kitchen and put the plate in the sink before answering again. 

**_You distracted me, I can’t concentrate if I have to keep stopping to answer u. And I’m watching the news. Movie was my answer. Let’s go to the cinema._ **


	11. Chapter 11

“I think that’s all! Thank you for your time. If nobody has any questions, you’re free to go,” Arthur said as he organized his papers, putting them back inside a folder.  The meeting with the board hadn’t been as bad as he had thought. Everybody welcomed him back, saying how much he was missed and how they were sorry for Uther’s death.  After presenting himself as the new president, Arthur had felt more comfortable seeing that people wanted him there. That was until he finished his speech.

“Not so fast. I have a question. In fact, I have a proposal for you, ladies and gentlemen.” Agravaine rose from his chair glancing around at all members of the board, leaving Morgana for last. Morgana just raised an inquisitive eyebrow to him.

Arthur tilted his head up, acknowledging Agravaine. “Yes, uncle. Please, share your thoughts.”  He could feel something bad was coming, but Agravaine was high enough in the company he could speak his mind whenever he wanted.

“I don’t think,” he began and then stopped to clear his throat. “I don’t think we should just jump to the conclusion that, with your father’s death, you are the one who immediately replaces him on the throne. I say we should have a voting.”

Arthur laughed and shook his head in disbelieve. “Throne? What is this? A kingdom? Was my father a king and I didn’t know?” Agravaine kept a straight face and Arthur turned serious. Around them, the members of the board were in a dead silence. Even Morgana was quiet. “Why do you think I shouldn’t rule my own company, uncle?”

“The company may be named Pendragon but that doesn’t mean you’re the only owner, Arthur.”

“Of course not,” Arthur agreed. “Is Morgana’s too. And everyone here has a fair share of stocks. Not as much as we do but –”

“It also doesn’t mean it was built by one person,” Agravaine interrupted.

“What are you trying to say? My father –”

“Created an empire from nothing,” Agravaine completed, rolling his eyes like Arthur was some petulant child. “No, he didn’t. Not alone, anyway. You think your father was so perfect, Arthur. But who do you think was in charge while he was banging my sister?”

Arthur saw red.  He would have jumped Agravaine’s neck if Morgana hadn’t held his wrist. He could have easily freed himself but he didn’t want to hurt her.

“Get out,” he hissed between his teeth.

“I dedicated my whole life to this company, never being recognized for my doings. Now is my turn and I won’t let anyone get in my way,” he shouted to Arthur and then turned to the board members. “I think you should discuss who you want to see sitting on that chair.” He pointed to Arthur. “Unless you were one hundred percent satisfied with how Uther handled things. And of course, if you don’t care about changes.”

Arthur couldn’t take it anymore. He freed himself from Morgana’s grip, rising from his chair, he took two steps toward his uncle and grabbed him by his tie.

“You ungrateful son of a bitch,” Arthur snarled, looking at Agravaine’s eyes before letting go of him.

Agravaine tried his best to smooth his tie as he spoke.

 “I never thought you were prepared for this and you just showed me I was right.” He took his briefcase from under the conference table and headed to the door. “More thirty years of someone who can’t listen to the truth without losing his temper. Is that what you lot want?”

“I’m so sorry,” Morgana apologized to the stunned members of the board. “Family issues,” she said to men and women in suits that kept looking back and forth from Arthur to Agravaine until the latter exited the room. She was trying to help and Arthur was grateful because he couldn’t think of anything other than his hands crushing his uncle’s throat. “If you could all give us some space now.”

“Morgana is right. Come on let’s go,” Gaius said. The older member on the board, he held an unofficial title of family advisor to Uther and his children. In the company, he was in charge of Human Resources.  He waited until everyone had left before addressing the siblings. “You have a big problem in your hands.”

“I know. Shouldn’t have lost my temper like that,” Arthur admitted with a sigh. “What do you think is gonna happen now, Gaius?”

“I fear to say, Arthur, but Agravaine does have a point.  Uther was a great leader, but your father wasn’t perfect. If you impose yourself on them they’ll see you as a tyrant and they’ll take you off the presidency.”

“So now what?” Arthur asked again since Gaius hadn’t answered him.

“Now you do as he says. Now you have a voting.”

 

***

Arthur was staring at the blank screen of his computer when he heard a knock on the door. He didn’t have time to answer before it opened.

“So?” Morgana closed the door behind her and went to sit on the chair across from Arthur.

“So, I’m fucked,” Arthur snapped. 

“Do you think they’re gonna pick Agravaine over you? Everybody likes you here,” she tried to reassure him. “They’ll never do that.”

“I’m not so sure. They may like me, but is that enough to put me in charge? They look at me and see someone who’s not prepared.”

“They know you’re prepared, they saw what you did when Father was sick.”

“And then he died and I couldn’t take the pressure,” Arthur reminded her, lowering his gaze. “I’m weak.”

“Arthur.” She reached over the desk to his hand and squeezed it. Arthur looked up. “You’re a natural leader, and a good one. You know me; I would never say this if I didn’t mean it.” That was true. Morgana had always made her opinions perfectly clear.  Knowing he had her support meant a lot to Arthur. He gave her a tired smile.

“Guess I should start preparing for this voting, then.”

“Of course,” she agreed, “After lunch.” She rose from the chair. “Come on, Leon and I want to hear about your date.”

“If you’re talking about last Saturday, sorry to disappoint you, it wasn’t a date.” She opened her mouth but he continued before she could say anything. “But if you really want to hear about my date with Merlin you’ll have to wait until next Monday.”

He took his wallet and rose from the chair, grinning at his sister.

“And if you or Leon open your mouths to talk about your attempts of getting pregnant I won’t tell you about the kiss.” Or the texting he added in his mind. Although he wasn’t sure he wanted to share that with anyone.

 

***

**_Fucking terrible day. Just want to crash in my bed and die. Now you entertain me._ **

As soon as he got home Arthur took his mobile out of his pocket and texted Merlin.  He had passed the rest of the day catching up on his work and thinking about the meeting with the board. All he wanted now was to talk about silly things with Merlin.

**_Try to correct an exercise wrote with an eleven years old boy writing, then u’ll see terrible. What happened?_ **

Arthur took off his tie and his shoes before answer.

**_Don’t wanna talk about it. Just know it sucked. Gonna take a shower._ **

He was already in his bedroom when Merlin responded.

**_Are you inviting?_ **

Arthur smile.

**_Yes. But you won’t make it in time. So here’s what’s gonna happen. I’m gonna call you and put you on speaker. Ok?_ **

He pressed send and didn’t wait for Merlin’s answer. The phone only rang three times.

“Got my last message?” Arthur said as soon as Merlin picked up.

“ _Yeah. Now you can tell me what happened._ ”

Arthur put on the speaker and let the mobile on the counter.

“Went back to work today.  Had a fight with my uncle, he wants to take me off the presidency.”

“ _Can he do that?”_

“Not alone.” Arthur finished taking his clothes off and opened the shower. “But if everyone at the board agrees with him then they can.”

“ _And you lose the company?”_

“No, but I wouldn’t be in charge anymore.” He stepped under the shower once the water was hot enough, letting it wash the tiredness out of his body. “Seriously, can we talk about something else?”

“ _Do you want to hear about my day?”_

“Yeah.”

“ _I had a test in the morning and nailed it. Spend the whole afternoon trying to teach grammar to a dyslexic kid. And now I’m trying to correct something that was clearly no written in English.”_

Arthur laughed. Merlin’s life seemed so uncomplicated.

_“You think it’s easy, don’t you? You prat!”_

“I didn’t say anything,” he answered, still laughing as he washed his body.

“ _You’re laughing! Stop laughing or I’ll hang up.”_

“Okay, stopped it,” Arthur promised.

“ _I’m just teasing. I’m sure your problems are worse than bad handwriting.”_  Merlin’s voice had turned serious and Arthur cursed himself mentally. He had called Merlin to try to forget about his shitty day, not to worry him. _“I want–”_ Now his voice sounded uncertain, as if he wanted to say something but didn’t know how.

“What?” Arthur prompted.

_“I- I want to help you relax. Will you think I’m too forward?”_

“No? Should I?”

“ _Phone sex,”_ Merlin blurted then, so fast Arthur almost thought he had heard it wrong.

“What?” Arthur laughed out loud this time. “You really are a big virgin, aren’t you?”

“ _I’m gonna hang up on you.”_ He sounded embarrassed, Arthur was sure he was blushing even though they couldn’t see each other.

“Sorry,” he said, though he was sure he didn’t sound very apologetic. “Are you sure?”

_“No, no. You know what. Maybe things are moving too fast between, I’m not like this, I swear.  Forget what I said –”_

“ _Mer_ lin! Breathe!”  Arthur heard Merlin sighing through the phone but he didn’t say anything. “Merlin?”

“ _Yeah?_ ”

“I’m waiting.”

“ _O-okay.”_  Merlin took a deep shaky breath. “ _Close your eyes.”_

And Arthur did.

***

The next Saturday Arthur was at Merlin’s door at exactly 20:30. It wasn’t a surprise when Merlin opened the door shirtless and barefoot.

“Just –” he began, already turning his back to Arthur.

“A minute,” Arthur completed. “I know.  Are you ever in time?”

“Oh, don’t be bossy.” Merlin went to his bedroom, and this time Arthur felt bold enough to follow him. He stayed at the doorframe, arms crossed in his chest.

Merlin opened a drawer and started throwing t-shirts behind his shoulders.

“We’re going to miss the movie.” Merlin turned to him.

“No, we’re not. Just –” He paused to pass the t-shirt on his neck. “… Need my shoes.”

“And socks.”

“Yeah, no socks. Haven’t done my laundry yet.”

“I can’t believe you don’t have one clean pair of socks!”

“Shut up, Arthur,” Merlin said as he walked around picking a jumper from his closet and a pair of blue Converses from under the bed.  He put on the jumper and sited on the edge of the bed to put the Converses.

Arthur looked around; there were another three pairs of Converses spreads across the room.

“Do you own any other kind of shoes?”

Merlin finished lacing his All Stars and shot Arthur a dangerous glare. 

“I take that as a no,” Arthur answer smile. There was an evil part of him the simply love to annoy Merlin.

Merlin rose from the bed and passed through him.

“We’re gonna miss the movie.”

“Hey!” Arthur grabbed him by the wrist forcing Merlin to look at him.

“I’m just messing with you,” Arthur said in form of apology.

“Because you’re a prat,” Merlin said, looking at his eyes.

“Because I’m a prat,” Arthur agreed, giving him a quick peck. “We’re late. Let’s go.”

They missed the session of the movie they wanted to see, so Arthur let Merlin pick a random one. It was science fiction. Arthur hated science fiction so he chose two seats in a far corner of the theatre so that he could kiss Merlin’s neck while he geeked about aliens and alternative universes.

“They should have made that on 3D,” Merlin said while they walked to a pizzeria after the movie. The place was close to the theatre so Arthur didn’t bother with the car.

“Yeah, sure,” agreed automatically.

“You don’t even know what I’m talking about, do you?” Arthur shook his head amused. “Bet you don’t even know the movie title.”

“Unless it has something to do with your neck, I don’t even care.”

Merlin blushed, averting his gaze.

“How come you can talk dirty to me on the phone and blush when I make you a compliment?” That just made Merlin blush even harder. Arthur took his hand. “Come on, I’m starving.”

***

“So, you’re a teacher?” They were finishing their third pizza. They talked about everything, Arthur told Merlin about Agravaine. Merlin admitted he didn’t understand the first thing about the business world but he was sure Arthur was good at his job.

“Private teacher. I only have to students actually, two eleven year-olds. Freya and Mordred. They both have dyslexia.” 

“You know, once Cathal said you were going to be a writer,” Arthur said taking a sip of his Coke. He wasn’t ready for alcohol yet.  Not after last week.

“I want to. But I had to start from somewhere.” He shrugged.  “Anyways, I like the kids. And I need the money.”

“Can’t be that much. Teaching only two kids.” Arthur didn’t mean to be an arsehole he was genuinely curious. 

“I have a scholarship.” He ate the last piece of his slice of pizza then said with his mouth full, “Sometimes I work as a waiter, when I need.” He swallowed and took a sip of his soda.

“Never thought about asking your dad’s help?”

“He’d say I made a mistake and tell me to come home.” Merlin shook his head. “I’ve come too far to give up. I’m graduating next year, anyway. Then I can take proper classes and work on my book.”

“Let me guess. Science fiction?” Arthur said smiling.

“Yes. I have a five-book plan. Three of them are kind of ready,” Merlin admitted, shyly.

“Can I read it?”

“You won’t like. You hated the move.”

“But that’s because I was too busy kissing you. So, can I?” Arthur was curious to see Merlin’s work, even if he didn’t like the genre.

“Only if you give me an honest opinion.”

“I promise.” 

They finished eating and Arthur paid the bill. Merlin tried to protest but Arthur silenced him telling he was the one who had invited Merlin.  They were about to leave when Merlin said he had to go to the loo first.

Arthur went to wait for him outside.

“Arthur?” He heard a female voice coming from behind him and turned to see its owner.

“Vivian!” His last female date was wearing a short blue dress that showed her curves, letting little to the imagination. Arthur never felt so gay.

“What are you doing here outside on your own?” She had a small pink cell phone on her hand, the device biped and she touched its screen, probably reading a text. “I’m waiting for a friend. Want to join us?”

“Oh no, I already ate. I’m just waiting for my boyfriend.”  Arthur felt a hand on his arm and turned to see Merlin looking back and forth between him and Vivian. “There you are. Let’s go?”

“Yeah, uh, hi!” Merlin said to Vivian.

“Hi! Whoops!” Her mobile made another sound; she glanced at the screen then looked at Arthur.  “My friend’s here.  I have to go. Bye!” She waved them both and left before they could answer.

“Oh, I have to tell you the story.” Arthur laughed then turned at Merlin. “Let’s go?”   Merlin was smiling at him. “What?”

“You just called me your boyfriend.”

Arthur was sure he was the one blushing this time.

 

***

“When is the voting, again?” Merlin asked, lining on the counter.  He had a glass of wine on his hand and observed Arthur while he finished preparing their dinner. They were celebrating a month anniversary. At least Merlin was since he was counting from the first time Arthur had called him his boyfriend. Arthur counted from the day they had their first kiss. But since Merlin was stubborn as a child they ended up celebrating his day.

“In three weeks.” The board had had another meeting, this time without Arthur or Agravaine. They decided the voting was necessary and set up one for the end of the month. Arthur had never been so anxious in his entire life. If it wasn’t for Merlin he wasn’t sure he’d have handled it.

 Their relationship was easy going, Merlin was more than a boyfriend; he was a truly loyal friend. Arthur loved to talk to him, they chatted every day over the phone, losing track of time and more often than not Arthur found himself going to sleep way past midnight.  After another glance at the oven, he turned to look at Merlin. 

“Almost done.” He took the glass from Merlin’s hand and finished its content. “Guess I could give you your present while we wait.”

“If you bought something expensive I swear I’ll hit you in the head with it.” Merlin had never accepted that Arthur spent money on him. Every time they went out he made sure they shared the bill. Sometimes Arthur managed to distract him and pay but that only made Merlin mad and he’d pout all the way to his home.

“Not expensive, promise.” He went upstairs and grabbed a small box from his closet.  When he got back to the living room Merlin was on the couch, he had put more wine to himself and filled another glass for Arthur. “Close your eyes.” Merlin did it. Arthur opened the small box, holding it in front of him. “You can open now.”

Merlin looked from the keys to Arthur and back to the keys but didn’t say anything.

“So? What do you think? I like having you around, but I really hate having to pick you up all the time. You might as well come when you want. And I know you enjoy the free Wi-Fi.” He smiled at Merlin.

“To be honest. Your internet connection is the only reason I’m dating you.” He took the keys in his hand. “And the food.”

“I’m shocked!”

“My turn, now.” Merlin reached his pocket and took a flash drive handing it to Arthur. “I want your honest opinion. Is more a job than a present.” Arthur took the flash drive from his hands, Merlin was giving him his book to read, the one he’s been working for years and had never shown to anyone. “You’re dating a broke college student. I’m sorry. I’ll give you something decent when I get my payment.”

“This is the best present,” Arthur said sincerely. “I’m the first one you’re showing it. That’s an honor.”  They looked at each other for a long time then Arthur cleared his throat. “Come on, let’s eat.”

Merlin followed him to the kitchen and set up the table while Arthur took the food from the oven. 

Arthur was planning more than just a dinner for their celebration.  While Merlin seemed happy with few Arthur was crawling up the walls. He wasn’t a teenager anymore and he didn’t count mutual wanker as sex but he took what he could get while waiting for Merlin to be ready to take another step in their relationship. Arthur wouldn’t push, but he really hoped Merlin would be ready tonight.  He put the lasagna on the table.

“It smells good. I think you’re trying to get lucky.” They sat across each other and Arthur poured more wine in Merlin’s glass.

“Guilty,” he confessed.

They ate in a comfortable silence then Merlin cleared his throat and Arthur looked up at him.

“Do you want to know what was in my letter?”

“It was for you. It’s not my place to –”

“But do you want to know, though?”

“Yeah, sure,” Arthur shrugged. “What did it said?”

“Lots of things that really don’t matter to you.” Arthur fought the urge to roll his eyes. “But the important bit is – He said we were perfect for each other. You and I. Like two sides of the same coin.”

Arthur didn’t like that.

“Really?”

“He said he thought about me the first time he laid eyes on you. He said we should definitely give it a try.”

 _We should give it a try._  Same words Merlin had used. Except they weren’t his, they were Cathal’s. Arthur put his plate aside.

“So you did what he told you.”

“What? No! I just thought if he said that –”

“You admit it.” Arthur gave a humorless laugh. “I thought you liked me!”

“I do!”

“Since when?” Arthur shook his head. “I knew that was something off. You kept calling, and texting and pushing it. We barely knew each other.”

“Arthur.”

“I thought you fancied me! But no. You were just trying to grant your brother’s last wish because you think you owed him.”

“Where the hell did you get that from?” Merlin shouted back.

“Oh, so I’m wrong? Look me in the eyes and tell me I’m wrong, Merlin.”

“I- I might have tried to follow his advice, at the beginning but-”

“You are just trying to compensate for not being there for him when he needed you.”

Merlin paled at that; Arthur could see the look of hurt on his face. He rose from his chair too quickly and it felt back behind him.

“I don’t know what happened to you that makes you think nobody can simply like you. But you know what? I don’t care. Happy first anniversary, Arthur.” He walked away. Arthur heard the front door open and slam shut the next second.

It wasn’t their first fight, they liked to provoke one another and sometimes someone ended up going a step too far, but this was definitely the worse one.


	12. Chapter 12

“Seriously, I think our mother had a love affair. I can’t be one hundred percent related to you!” 

Arthur groaned, raising his head from his desk he glanced at his computer screen. His background was a picture of Merlin with a sleepy smile, his hair all over the place. Arthur remembered the day he had taken that photo. Merlin was at his place, he had fallen asleep with his head on his books while waiting for Arthur to finish dinner.  Arthur didn’t usually do that but Merlin looked so adorable when he woke him up that Arthur couldn’t resist, he reached for his mobile and took the photograph. 

It had been a week since the fighting. Arthur hadn’t heard a word from Merlin since. He didn’t go after him either. He told Morgana about what happened and she kept saying he was a bloody idiot.

“I like Merlin; I can’t believe you broke up with him because of a stupid letter.”

“First of all, you never even met him. Second, we didn’t break up,” he corrected, hoping that was true. “Third, I’m sure Uther must have found you somewhere.”

“He makes you happy, I could see that.  And if you didn’t break up, why have you passed the last few days crying on my shoulders instead of going after him?” She ignored his last statement.

“Because he doesn’t like me. He’s just trying to please his-”

“Oh, come on Arthur. Do you honestly think he would’ve put up with you for a month just because his brother said so?  He likes you, and if you weren’t such a bloody arse you’ll go after him and fix this before you lose someone who clearly likes you.”

The worse thing was: she was right, he was making a big thing out of nothing and that could cost him Merlin’s heart.

“I don’t want to lose him,” He admitted.

“Is not to me that you have to say this.” She got up and left his office before Arthur could say anything.

 

***

Arthur didn’t know why exactly he ended up at Merlin’s favorite pub. It wasn’t Saturday and he didn’t expect to find him there.  He didn’t expect to find Gwaine either.

“Princess! Didn’t expect to see you here.”  Arthur turned to see a smiling Gwaine looking at him. He smiled back.

“Likewise. You live here or something?”

“I own the place actually.” He turned to the girl behind the counter. “Lucy, darling. I’ll have what he's having. And it’s all one the house.”

“You don’t need to do that.” 

“Consider it courtesy.” The girl, Lucy put another shot of whiskey for Arthur and one for Gwaine. Arthur drank it all in one go. “The next time you make Merlin cry I’ll poison your drink.”  Arthur swallowed hard. He looked from his empty glass to Gwaine. “And charge you for it.”

“Have you seen him?”  Gwaine’s words hit him. Merlin was hurt. Of course, he was. Arthur saw the look on his face when he left his flat that night, but hearing someone saying it was even worse.

“Of course, princess. He’s a mess.” Gwaine finished his drink, pushing the glass towards the balcony. “I would break some bones if I knew it’ll make him feel better, you know.”

 _You think I’m afraid of you?_ Arthur thought, but starting a fight with Merlin’s best mate wouldn’t do any good.  He couldn’t just leave it alone, though. So he provoked.

“Maybe now you’ll have your chance?”

Gwaine laughed out loud.

“Good, jealousy. So you really like him, then.”

“So do you.”

“Do you know how many times I tried to get in his pants, Arthur?” Arthur thought about the night they met but Gwaine kept talking before he could say anything. “None. If I wanted to sleep with him, I’d already had.”

“Could have fooled me. I saw the way you look at him. I saw the way you looked at _me_ when I looked at him.”

“I meant it, princess. Sure, I thought about it when we met but – Have you seen Merlin? He’s like a freaking magical creature.  He’s all sweet and friendly; bloke wears his heart on his sleeve. And I know I’m not a saint. I wouldn’t ruin the best friendship I have just for a good shag,”  Gwaine said with a smirk.

Arthur didn’t know what to make from that information, but suddenly he started to see Gwaine through eyes. Arthur sighed.

“He loves you, Arthur. He really does. You know why you were the one he called when he was all broken in pieces after reading that letter?”

“Because Cathal said-”

“Exactly.” Gwaine interrupted. “They were twins, they always took care of each other. They knew what’s best for each other. And Cathal knew you were the best for Merlin. You should be grateful. Merlin isn’t following instructions, he’s following his heart.”

“I feel like I’ve been played,” Arthur admitted.

“So? It led you to Merlin. Was it so bad?” 

 It wasn’t. The more Arthur thought about it the more he felt like a complete idiot.

He took his wallet from his pocket and put a bill note he thought it would cover what he consumed on the balcony, using his glass to hold it.  Gwaine was about to protest but Arthur talked first.

“If you end up giving me the poison, make it for free.”

 

***

He didn’t know if it was the alcohol leaving his system or what but Arthur could feel his courage getting smaller the closer he got to Merlin’s door.  Nimueh didn’t offer any resistance when he passed through her and went to the lift.

Arthur suspected Nimueh had announced him because Merlin’s door opened as soon as he reached it. But Merlin wasn’t the one to welcome him.

 “You must be Arthur!”

He knew they’d ended up meeting at some point, but he didn’t expect it to be today.

“Guinevere?”

“Please, call me Gwen.”

Gwen was a dark skinned woman with curled hair and a sweet smile. She was like a female version of Merlin. 

Arthur looked at her belly. It didn’t show any trace of pregnancy yet, but it was too soon for that anyway. She noticed his look and pressed a protective hand over her abdomen.

“You can’t see anything yet.” She offered him a shy smile. “I hope this isn’t too awkward.”

“No, not at all.” And it wasn’t. Arthur smiled at her.  She seemed to be a nice person, just like Lance had described her. Arthur thought he could never hate her. And he didn’t have any reason to.  “Er, is Merlin home?”

“Yes. I was just leaving,” she answered, showing the purse on her shoulder. “You two behave like adults.”

“I’ll try,” he promised as she passed by him. She was calling the lift when he thought about something. “Er, Gwen?” Arthur waited until she turned at him. “I hope you and Lance are happy.”

“We wish the same for you and Merlin,” she replied with another sweet smile before entering the lift.

Guinevere had left the door open so Arthur went inside. “Merlin?”

Merlin was half lying on the couch, a book on his hand but Arthur could see he wasn’t reading it. Merlin closed the book and sat up. Arthur had no idea what to say.

“I just. I just met Guinevere.”

“I heard.” Merlin didn’t meet his eyes.

“I also talked to Gwaine.” That made Merlin look at him.

“You’re gonna start stalking my friends now?”  Merlin was angry. Arthur couldn’t blame him.

“I met him at his pub. You never said he was the owner.”

“Does it matter? What are you doing here, Arthur?”

Arthur took a deep breath.

“This year has been fucking me over and over again. I lost my father, I was dumped, I tried to help someone and he ended up dead. And now I might lose my job. I – I don’t want to lose the only good thing I have. ” He was struggling with his words, he’d never opened his heart like that to anyone and it was a relief to take it all out of his chest. It was also terrifying, to be so open. 

“Don’t worry. I don’t think they’ll choose your uncle over you.”

“Agravaine _did_ help my father, he’s got as much right to be the president as I do. Maybe more,” Arthur shrugged. “But honestly, right now I couldn’t give a damn about it. I’m not talking about my job, Merlin. I’m talking about you. What we have. It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me in a long time.  And knowing I might have thrown everything away because of –”

Merlin got up from the couch, he went to his bedroom and for a moment Arthur thought he didn’t want to listen anymore. But Merlin came back; walking right up to him, he stopped in from of Arthur.

“Read it.”  He handed a piece of paper to Arthur.

It was Cathal’s letter. Arthur started reading it, the paper on his hand was probably the second part of the letter. Cathal talked about their childhood and the girl Merlin nearly shagged when he was sixteen. He kept passing his eyes through the words without really reading until he spotted his name.

_“… Arthur is the best. He honestly likes to help people. Just like you Merls. The way I’m living my life… I know I won’t last long.  But I’ll make sure he gives you this letter. I haven’t done much for you these past years. Haven’t been a good brother. But I’ll make it up to you. Both of you. Arthur tried to help me the best way he could, and you’re my best friend. I think you two would be perfect for each other, like two sides of the same coin. You should give it a try. But I won’t tell him this. I don’t know him that much but I can see he’s a very reserved person. So it’s up to you, Merlin. If you like him (and I bet you will), you’ll have to swallow down your shyness and go after what you want. Look at me! I’m playing matchmaker through a letter! How fucking lame is that? But seriously, though. Take care of him, Merls. I don’t know what happened to him, but he’s sad.  He needs someone to talk to, to take out of his chest whatever it is he’s been keeping in there for so long. And I can’t think of anyone better than you…”_

Arthur couldn’t read anymore. His vision was blurry. He gave the letter back to Merlin before his tears could stain the paper. It had been so long since he cried. Not even when Uther died.  He couldn’t remember. He started breathing heavily, feeling the tears making wet tracks on his cheeks.

Arthur opened his mouth but he couldn’t say anything. All he could do was cry. Cry for his father, for Cathal, for himself, for all those things he kept holding onto his chest too afraid to show, to look weak.

Merlin took a step ahead and wrapped his arms around him. Arthur buried his head on the crock of Merlin’s neck. He almost smiled, remembering he had done the same thing for Merlin when they met. 

Merlin ran his fingers through Arthur’s hair until he felt Arthur getting calmer.  He stepped back and held Arthur’s chin, lifting it up.

“Better?”

Arthur shook his head. 

“Well. Guess I’ll have to entertain you, then.” Merlin started walking towards him again but Arthur put his hands on his chest, stopping him.

“I’m sorry for being such an idiot.” 

Merlin sighed.

“It’s okay. I read that letter a lot of times. Trying to see what my brother saw, someone who’s afraid of showing their feelings; for fear that people might use it against them.” He took hold of Arthur’s hand. “I’m not with you because of what Cathal said. I’m with you because you came to pick up my pieces when I called you that night because you make me laugh.” He paused to kiss Arthur’s palm. “Because I can talk to you about everything because I can see you have a good heart.” Merlin let go of Arthur’s hand. He came closer, tilting his head to place kisses on Arthur’s neck. “Because you’re hot.”  From the corner of his eye, Arthur saw he was smiling.

Merlin wrapped an arm around Arthur’s waist, pulling him closer.  He kissed his way to Arthur’s mouth. Arthur’s knees felt weak, he sat down on the sofa, Merlin between his legs. Arthur pulled Merlin on top of him by the hem of his t-shirt; Merlin came easily, his arms up so that Arthur could pull the t-shit off.

 They kissed each other hungrily for a long time but then Merlin stopped; he got out of Arthur’s lap and left the couch. He pushed Arthur to his feet by his belt and then with a hand on his chest he guided Arthur backward towards his bedroom. Arthur only stopped walking when he felt the back of his knees hit the bed, never once taking his eyes off Merlin’s.

 

***

It was the middle of the night, few hours from the dawn maybe. Arthur was lying on his back, Merlin’s head on his chest, one arm draped across his waist.

“I forgot a reason.” Merlin shifted on the bed, resting his chin on Arthur’s chest so that he could look at him.

“What?” Arthur prompted as he studied some of the marks he had left on Merlin’s silky skin.

“When I was explaining why I’m with you I forgot the main reason.” Even though it was dark Arthur could see he was blushing.

“And what’s that?” He asked smiling, pulling Merlin closer to him.

Merlin gave him a long kiss before answering.

“I’m in love with you.”


	13. Chapter 13

Only three of the board members voted for Agavaine. Counting him. It was Leon who gave Arthur the news.

“Your sister would have come if she weren’t so busy mocking your uncle,” he said after telling the results Arthur.

“You should tell her to hold her tongue. He can sue her,”  Arthur said laughing.

“I don’t think he’s got the balls to try. Anyway, I have to get back to work, boss.”  He turned to leave but Arthur called him before he opened the door.

“Leon?”

“Yes?”

“Macken’s Pub tonight,” he pointed his index at Leon. “You and Morgana. It’s  an order.”

 “Yes, sire!” Leon made a half reverence before leaving the office.

Arthur was happy, and he felt like celebrating with all of his and Merlin’s friends.  He took his mobile from the top drawer and typed a quick message to Merlin.

**_Gwaine’s pub tonight. Invite everybody._ **

He hit send and after thinking about it a little, he texted:

**_Lance and Gwen as well._ **

He barely had time to send it before Merlin’s reply came.

**_U WON!!!_ **

Arthur laughed and shook his head.

**_U make it sound like I won the lottery._ **

He couldn’t concentrate on his work so he just waited for Merlin’s answer.

**_U don’t need the lottery. U’re already rich. Everybody’ s coming btw._ **

**_Great! C u at night. Try to be ready in time. Love you._ **

****

***

Everybody was already there when Arthur and Merlin got to the pub – like always – even Leon and Morgana the latter already on an animated conversation with Gwen.

“They seemed to be getting along like a house on fire,” Lancelot said to him after he and Merlin had greeted everybody and found a place to sit. Different from what Arthur had thought, seeing Lance didn’t feel awkward at all. Or maybe it was just because he was too happy to care.

“You think it’s safe?” He asked with a fun expression.

“Hell, no.” Lance laughed.

“Lucy, babe. Come here!” Gwaine called the brunet girl, who was working as a waitress tonight.

Lucy came with small a note pad. “Can I take your orders?” She took a pen from behind her left ear.

“I think we should start with beer. What do you say?” Percival asked looking for every one of them.

Everybody was agreeing until he looked at Gwen.

“Well, no obviously.” She looked at Lucy. “I’ll have orange juice, please.”

“Me too,” Morgana said, and all eyes on the table turned to her.

“Oh, my goodness you’re –” Arthur didn’t finish the sentence; he got up and went to hug her with a huge smile on his face.

“We’re having a baby!” Leon explained for the rest of the table, squeezing Morgana’s hand.

Percival, Mithian, Elena, Will, Lance, Merlin and even Gwaine went to hug her after Arthur.

“You knew!” Arthur said to Gwen when he noticed she didn’t hug Morgana as well.

“Fifteen minutes before you. Not my fault you were late.” She answered looking at Merlin. “You can’t put two pregnant women in the same space and not expect they’ll talk about babies.”

Arthur made a bad job of looking angry at Merlin.

“Sorry!” Merlin raised his hands in defeat.

“Whatever, I’ve already lost all hope of getting anywhere in time with you.” He turned to Lucy, who was still waiting for their orders. “This round is on me!”  Then he opened a huge grin and added. “I’m an uncle!” 

Lucy smiled at them and left.

“If that’s how you get about being an uncle I can’t wait to see you when you became a father,” Merlin said.

“I knew you had a uterus hidden in there, Merlin,” Percival teased with a smirk.

“Fuck off!” Merlin replied, with a grin.

“You guys have thought about it?” Mithian asked looking between Merlin and Arthur.

“Not yet, but.” Arthur shrugged. “It’s an idea, right?”  He looked at Merlin. They haven’t discussed that, but sure, being a parent was somewhere in Arthur’s list.  He hoped it was in Merlin’s too.

“Sure,” Merlin replied, taking his hand.

The rest of the night passed in a blur, they almost forgot about Arthur’ s job and the main reason they were celebrating. All the attention was shared between the two pregnant women.  Arthur had planned a celebration with just him and Merlin but when they finally got to his house, way past 2:00 a.m., all Arthur had the energy for was to take his shoes off and crash in bed, fully clothed.

 

***

A few months later Arthur was in his home office finishing the project he’d been working on since he had gotten back to his job. He was so distracted he almost didn’t notice Merlin coming in with two mugs on his hand. He put the mugs on the desk and set on Arthur’s lap.

“Tea?” Arthur asked pointing the mugs.

“Yeah.” Merlin took one of the mugs and took a sip from it, then glanced at the computer. “What are you doing?”

“Finishing something.” Arthur shifted on the chair to take the other mug.

 “Can I know about it? Or is it some kind of secret?”

“Of course.”  Arthur scrolled back to the top of the document.

“Igraine Pendragon Foundation?” Merlin read on the screen. Arthur looked at him.

“It’s something I’ve been working on for a while. It’s for homeless people. Kind of like what I did in Dublin. What do you think?”

Merlin looked at the screen again, reading it. Then he put his mug on the desk and turned to face Arthur.

“I think it’s brilliant. I think _you’re_ brilliant.” He smiled. Somehow his approval was important to Arthur.

“I’ve always wanted to do something like this. Sure, we donate to a lot of institutions.  But I wanted to do something myself, you know.” He placed a hand on one of Merlin’s thighs. “I’m gonna show it to the board tomorrow.”

“You need their approval for everything? I thought you were the owner.”

“It doesn’t mean I can do whatever I want. It doesn’t work like that.”

“And if they say yes?”

“Then it’s a long way, a lot of hard work and probably some boyfriend negligence before it finally comes true.”

“That last bit doesn’t sound very good,” Merlin joked.

“But it will be worth it. In Dublin, they were just four blokes and an old house, with a little help from the government. I’m thinking about something bigger.”

“But who’s gonna take care of it? Because you already work more than it’s probably healthy.”

“I know. I already have someone in mind.” He finished his tea and put the mug next to Merlin’s. “Fred.”

“Cathal’s friend?”

“Yes. He’s a great guy; he’s worked with something like this before I guess. And he saw firsthand how it is to live on the streets. I think he’s the perfect man for this.”

“Have you talked to him?”

“Not yet. I still have to wait for the commission to approve. And even then it’s a long way down. I was thinking about going to Dublin to ask him in person.” He waited for a moment then added. “You could come along. Visit Cathal’s grave.”

“And my father.”

Arthur winced.

“He wasn’t always like that, you know,” Merlin said wrapping his arms around Arthur’s neck. “It was mom’s death, it changed him. I think some part of him died with her that day,” Merlin tried to defend his father. Arthur didn’t buy it.

“But what about when you said you’re coming to London. When you said you wanted to be a writer. You said he didn’t like it.”

“He’s a parent; he wanted me to follow his path just like your dad did.” Even though Merlin had a point, all Arthur could see when he thought about Balinor was the cold man on Cathal’s funeral. But he didn’t say anything to Merlin.

“So we’re going to Dublin?” He opened his browser and started typing the address of an airline company.  Merlin got off Arthur’s lap and took the mugs.

“Nothing expensive, Arthur,” he said glancing to the computer before he left.

Arthur bought two first class tickets.

Merlin didn’t talk to him for almost a week.

 

***

The board approved Arthur’s project. Like he knew they would.

Going back to Dublin left a bittersweet taste in Arthur’s mouth.

It was good to see Peter and the guys again. It was good to see Fred, who accepted his offer as soon as he heard what the project was about. Fred nearly fainted when he saw Merlin. Although for Arthur Merlin and Cathal were so different he almost forgot the physical resemblance now. Fred called Merlin Cathal more than once, but Merlin didn’t seem to care.

The meeting with Balinor was weird. He cried and hugged Merlin when he saw his son, telling Merlin he was sorry for not telling him about Cathal and for not accepting Merlin’s career choice. He seemed like a whole different man. Until of course, he saw Arthur with Merlin, he was polite but cold like an iceberg, barely saying three words to Arthur.   Arthur suspected they would never like each other. He wasn’t keen to make any effort to change that.

They only stay in Dublin for the weekend.

***

It took almost a year from the day the board approved Arthur’s project to the inauguration party for the Igraine Pendragon Foundation.

It was a huge event.  Between taking photos, talking to people, shaking hand and trying to eat some of the tiny canapés that were being served Arthur almost didn’t see Merlin. He missed him like hell. Arthur did the math, the last time they had seen each other for more than a couple of hours had been on Merlin’s graduation. And that was a month ago.

Arthur tried to get to Merlin more than twice in that evening, but every time he looked at him he was dancing with someone different. 

It was only when they got to Arthur’s place, several hours later, that Arthur had the chance to really talk to Merlin.

“I can’t believe is finally over,” Arthur said taking his tie and the jacket of his tuxedo out.

“I’m never dancing with you secretary again,” Merlin cried, crashing on the couch. He took his shoes off and started to rub his left foot.

“Don’t be such a girl Merlin,” Arthur teased.

“She stepped on my feet,” Merlin complained, with an indignant look on his face. “With high heels!” He shook his head and added. “I’m pretty sure she broke something.” He made a pained expression when his finger pressed a spot on his foot.

Arthur sat in front of him and took Merlin’s foot. 

“Stop complaining or I won’t show you what I bought for us,” he said as he massaged Merlin sore foot.

“What is it? If it’s some kind of sex toy, you’ll have to play it alone today.”

“Is not that!” He let go of Merlin and went to his bedroom. Coming back a little later with two plane tickets on his hands.

“I know I haven’t been the best boyfriend these past months. And I say the wrong thing sometimes. And I don’t always have time –”

“Arthur, are you giving me a present or trying to break up with me?” Merlin teased him. He got up from the sofa and took the tickets from Arthur. “New York?” Arthur’s shoulders tensed, knowing what Merlin would say next. “First class? That costs a fortune, Arthur. We already discuss this-” 

“Forget about the price.” Arthur cut him off; he didn’t want to start a fight so he said. “You’ll have much more important things to think about if you accept to go.”

“Like what?”

Arthur put his hands on Merlin’s waist.

“Like the huge among of queues you’ll have to take to change your documents to Merlin Pendragon.”

Merlin’s jaw fell.

“Are you…?”

Arthur nodded.

Merlin started crying and laughing at the same time, jumping around like an excited puppy.

“Oh, my God! Oh, my God! I’m going to the States! I’m getting married!” He looked at the tickets on his hands then back to Arthur. “I have to call Gwen!”

“Is that a yes, then?” Even being obvious, he really wanted to hear it.

“What? Of course it’s a yes, you clotpole.” Merlin wrapped his around Arthur's shoulders and kissed him for a long time.

When they pulled apart Arthur asked with a smile.

“Weren’t you going to call Gwen?”

Merlin gave him another kiss before answer.

“Later.”

 


	14. Chapter 14

Epilogue

4 years later

There was nothing Arthur could do besides waiting. He grabbed his mobile to look at the time. Again. It had only been two minutes since the last time he had seen it.

Arthur went to his photo folder to try to distract himself. He looked at the number of pictures and smiled. Ever since he started dating Merlin he had acquired the habit of taking pictures.  He started passing through the photos. Most of them were Merlin’s, sometimes the two of them together. Of course, Arthur never remembered to pass them to his computer. There were some really old ones from their wedding, the moving to the house Arthur had grown up in, the trip to France and the launch of Merlin’s first book.  Arthur took some time looking at that one. It was of Merlin and Gwaine. Merlin was with the first copy of the book in his hand, grinning like the cat from Alice in Wonderland. He had insisted to take the photo with Gwaine since he was the one who had known somebody, who knew somebody that had interest in publishing Merlin’s story.

The photos weren’t helping anymore. Arthur put his mobile in his pocket and glanced at Merlin. He was paler than usual; he was biting his thumb, staring blankly at the wall in front of him. Arthur was about to make a comment when the nurse that had been keeping them updated appeared.

“They’re ready to see you.” She waited until they got up from the plastic white chairs then added. “Follow me.”

Arthur took hold of Merlin’s cold hand. While they followed the nurse through the hospital corridors, he started to think about the events that had led them to that day.

 

9 months before

Arthur had gotten home later than usual that day because of a meeting he had with Fred about the Foundation. He found Merlin sitting on the couch with his arm on his knees, his chin resting on his hand. He was staring at the coffee table.

“Hi,” Arthur said, but Merlin didn’t seem to notice him, so he called again, putting his hand on Merlin’s shoulder. “Merlin?” Merlin looked up at him. “Is everything alright?”

Merlin sighed.

“It’s Mordred and Freya. She’s pregnant.”

“Didn’t even know they knew each other,” Arthur confessed. Even after taking a regular job teaching English in a private school, Merlin still gave occasional classes to his first students.

“Yeah, they’re from the same school. Sometimes it was easy to just give the classes for both of them together, they helped each other.” He shook his head. “They’re only sixteen. Her parents won’t let her keep the baby.”

“They’re gonna make her do an abortion?”

“I don’t know. They’re kind of religious people. Guess there’s some rule against it.”

Arthur sat down next to him. “So, what are they going to do?”

Merlin looked a little uncertain. He took a deep breath before speaking.

“I talked to them today. Freya and Mordred. They don’t feel ready to take care of a baby. But they also don’t want to give it away like a toy they don’t want anymore. So,” he turned to Arthur and took his hand. “They made a suggestion.”

“A suggestion?” Arthur could already see where that was going.

“Yeah, they said. They said that since I’m married, have a stable job and like kids.”

“They offered you the baby?”  Arthur asked slowly. He pictured the two teenagers saying those things to Merlin.

“Not like that but, yeah, they did.”

“And what did you said?”

“I said I had to talk to you. And now I did, so. We’ve discussed this before but we’re always saying later. I think maybe now _is_ later. What do you say?”

“It’s a huge step. Do you think we’re ready?”

Merlin kissed him, but he didn’t answer.

Freya’s parents seemed a little uncertain about the idea of giving their grandchildren to a gay couple. Of course, all those fears disappeared when they heard the name Pendragon. That made Arthur feel a little sick like he was buying some goods instead of adopting a child. But it was what he and Merlin wanted and Freya’s parents might as well go fuck themselves.

 

***

When they got to Freya’s room the nurse opened the door and let them in saying they still had a lot of forms to fill and that they only had a few minutes because Freya needed to rest before closing the door behind her.

“Hey!” Merlin let go of Arthur’s hand and went to his student. She looked small on the hospital bed. “How are you two?”

“A little tired, but I guess it’s normal. Do you want to hold him?” She held the small bundle of clothes to Merlin, who took the baby and went to where Arthur was.

“Look at him! He’s perfect!” He smiled to Arthur, his eyes were watery. Arthur looked at the small human being. His son. He was sleeping peacefully in Merlin’s arms.

“Have you guys chosen a name yet?” Freya asked.

Arthur exchanged a look with Merlin, they smiled at each other and answered in a unison.

“Yes.”

The nurse appeared in the door again and told them they would have to let Freya and the baby rest.

“Just a minute,” Merlin said, and then he put the baby in Arthur’s arms. The baby felt the change of heat and opened his eyes.

Arthur looked down at him. Although it hadn’t been even an hour that he was brought into this world and it was probably his imagination, Arthur could swear it, and he would for the rest of his life.

Cathal was smiling at him.

 

 

 

 


End file.
